Wednesday, August 04, 2004

The Very Last Minute

Rich is not known for telling me something the minute it is on his mind. He waits....And waits....And waits. I still don't know what he is waiting for. The right time? The right place?

I can't really imagine being rowed out to the middle of a lake, under a full moon at night and Rich reaching out to hold my hand and saying,
"Before we get married I just want you to know I really love you..... and I also really love circus peanuts." When do these things come up in conversation?

This morning he was running late for work which loosely translates as he woke up at 8:00am but lounged around while I read him an email from his sister and we chatted until 8:45am. That's when he rummaged through his underwear drawer like an anxious dog digging in the backyard for a bone. "Uhm, what are you looking for in there?" I asked curiously. Rich held up a pair of underwear and said, "These have holes in them." I said, "Ok, well throw them away and I will buy a new 3 pack today." Then he held up his belt and said, "I really need a new belt. Look at this thing. I have put 6 holes in it myself and the buckle is falling off."

I started to laugh. After he put 2 holes or even 1 he could've mentioned his worn out belt issue to me. I am not known for my frivolous spending but I think a belt to keep your pants up is a critical part of a man's wardrobe. I would've bought him a new belt last year if I had known.

At this point Rich headed into the shower and I went in the kitchen to pack his lunch. Now I do know that he likes only a little bit of mustard on his bologna sandwich so I began to prepare this for him. I got a little too much mustard on the bread and after it was all spread I thought it looked too "mustardy" for Rich. I knocked on the bathroom door and I said, "Can you just take a look at this? Is this too much mustard for your bologna sandwich?" He looked and said,"I meant to tell you I wanted peanut butter and jelly today because the lunch box doesn't keep the sandwiches cold anymore." I tossed the bread in the trash and prepared another sandwich. When was he going to tell me about the sandwich? It was 8:55am! He leaves for work at 9:00am!

I sent him off for work with one peanut butter and jelly and one peanut butter and fluff sandwich and the promise of new underwear and a new belt when he got home.
It is challenging being married to a non-communicator but he is a great guy, with a wonderful sense of humor and he always puts his family first. Even if he didn't tell me what he needed I think I would've known when his pants eventually fell down and he was standing in holey underwear!

Is your significant other a good communicator?

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