Friday, September 29, 2006

Candy issues

Lillianna is having candy issues. You can read about it at Lillianna's Place.

Learning to be assertive

This post was published over at DotMoms today.

Nineteen years ago today....

It's just too unbelievable to admit that my dad has been gone for nineteen years. Kara has been without him longer than she was with him since he died right before her 13th birthday. I was 24 and still felt I was too young to lose a parent.

Kara emailed me last night from her honeymoon and said she couldn't believe it was nineteen years. That amount of time seems like forever. Things have never been the same since he died. We've never been the same.

I felt like I really needed to write about that day,today. I don't have too much to add to this,which really tells the complete story but here is what I remember.

It was a Tuesday morning around 11:00am. The phone rang and it was my Uncle Robert,Daddy's brother. He worked side by side with my father in the bakery where Dad was the manager. Uncle Robert asked to talk to my mother but I said she was out shopping. Later,I learned that Mom was shopping for a black skirt for no reason at all. Kind of creepy.

Anyway,Uncle Robert said to tell Mom to get to Boston City Hospital as soon as she could because my dad was sick. He didn't say more.
A while later,Mom came home and I gave her the message. We weren't really worried because "sick" doesn't mean "dead." I don't even remember what we were thinking was wrong with him.

A few minutes later,Uncle Robert called and all he said was,"Let me talk to your mother." I asked him what was wrong. He wouldn't tell me. I wouldn't give Mom the phone until he did. He said he wouldn't. I guess I thought it was going to be bad news and by then,I suppose I knew what the news was. By not giving Mom the phone,we'd never have to hear it,right?

Tears were already streaming down my face when I handed her the receiver. I don't remember how she reacted or what she said or did next but I remember walking out of the kitchen and into the living room and screaming! Just screaming. Then I fell on the living room rug and my teal shoe went sailing across the room as it slipped off my foot.

Eventually,Papa came home from work and I sat at the kitchen table talking to him,trying to make sense out of all of this. That's when I had my very first anxiety attack and I couldn't breathe. Papa took me outside with a brown paper bag and helped me to breathe again. The tears never stopped.

Mom's friend,Rozie,took me aside and told me to "stop it" because I was upsetting my mother. I just stayed by Papa's side for a very long time and tried to stop crying but I couldn't.

At some point,Mom said people had to be notified and she gave me the phone book and told me who to call. Since it was a Tuesday,most people were at work so I got to leave a cheery message like this:
"Hi Bev and Sherm.This is Robin. I just wanted to let you know that my father just died. to you soon.Bye"

I went into some psychotic robot-like state and made all the calls in a sing-songy voice. I didn't even cry until all the calls were made. Then I went back to snuggle Papa.

Meanwhile,my 12 year old sister,was in school,completely oblivious to all of this. Mom sent her brother,Louis,to pick Kara up and tell her the news. He was,afterall,a high school guidance counselor and could handle this. According to Kara who says we totally did the wrong thing that day,this meeting did not go well.

Uncle Louis pulled the car over a block from our house and said something like,"Kara,your father is very sick. Your father is dead." Kara just glared at him and said,"Take me home!"

When I saw her walk in the door I ran to her and hugged her. She pulled away and through clenched teeth said,"Don't touch me!"

I don't remember much after that. People came to visit. Everyone said they were sorry. Of course they should be sorry. MY FATHER DIED!! I hated everyone and resented their very presence in my house.

Somehow we all survived and I suppose we came out stronger than ever before. To tell you the truth,I'd rather be weaker and still have my father here with us. I think we all would.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Tired of being a bitch

You wouldn't think I'd be tired of being a bitchy,disgruntled and petty wife since it comes so easily to me, but I am. I'm really tired of it. It takes so much energy away from the things I want to enjoy and it thoroughly exhausts me. I'm sure it hasn't made Rich's life a bowl of cherries,either. Wait....he hates cherries.....ok,let's say I haven't made his life a bag of circus peanuts.

I try not to nag and be a huge bitch because who wants to live with that? I sure don't. I'm thrilled that Rich isn't that way. The past week and a half has been worse than usual and I wonder how long I can use PMS as an excuse.

If I could just stop worrying about money and everything else that is on my mind,maybe I wouldn't be such a bitch.....It's just a theory.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Hot delivery guys

Kara and Peter's office is right in the center of town. It is on a fairly small but unbelievably busy street where cars,buses,trucks and ambulances are constantly in motion. There are tons of businesses on this street which means there are many UPS,Fed-Ex and Poland Springs deliveries.

For some reason,these guys are always hot looking. Is it from lifting heavy packages and gallons of water all day long?

I know that "Doug" the IPS driver on King Of Queens is no stud muffin but "Deacon" sure is.

I wonder what the screening process is to get hired at one of these places. Do they all have to be "hot?"

My temporary new job

Well,here I one at Kara and Peter's mortgage company. They flew off to their honeymoon this morning and I am in charge....whatever that entails.

I like it here,I really do. The callers are either people looking to purchase a home or re-finance or they are calling from a bank,lawyer's office or some other type of financial institution. They are all professional and so far,no one has been rude.

I am here for 8 work days and I am hoping I can handle anything that comes in. I will be emailing Peter at the end of every day if there are things he has to address. Other than that,Kara has trained me to do various things that may come up and I promised to do my best. They are just grateful to have me here so that they didn't have to close the office,which would be very bad for business.

Even though the commute here is horrible....way too much traffic.....I managed to arrive in 35 minutes which is only 5 more minutes than it takes to get to my other 2 jobs.

I hope I don't get too attached to this job. I may never want to leave it.

Monday, September 25, 2006

The Brownie update

After all of this craziness,I finally got a call today that Lillianna is in the troop that I wanted to get her into. Three of her good friends are in this troop and apparently,they go on all kinds of fun trips.

I got an email from the troop leader today explaining about this huge trip to New York in June. It said each girl has to sell an average of 400 boxes of cookies! Whatever we don't sell,we have to pay out of pocket for the trip which is $400 per mom and daughter. Where the heck am I gonna come up with that kind of money? We have never come close to selling that amount of cookies.

If you live in my area,please,oh please by a box of cookies from my child who is desperate to go on this trip.....400 boxes......are they serious?

How many boxes of cookies does your Brownie have to sell?

Sunday, September 24, 2006

What I wish I had said

I am really burnt out of ophthalmology. The writing was really on the wall this past Thursday when I had one bitchy,obnoxious,whining patient after the next. I wanted to run out the front door and never look back. Sixteen years at one job is way too long.

Here are the comments I got from patients and what I wish I had said to them.

1. I'm not really good at this kind of thing.

It doesn't take a brain surgeon to keep your eyes open and read a chart!

2. Can you tell if my eyes have changed?

What am I,psychic? Why don't I wait until the exam is actually done before I give you an answer.

3. No,I'm not diabetic. I take pills for that.

If you take diabetes pills,guess what dipstick? You are diabetic!!

4. I didn't wear my hearing aide. Can you speak up?

No,I won't speak up. Stop living in denial that you are deaf as a haddock and just wear your hearing aide!

5. I don't really like people near my eyes!

That's too freakin' bad. You're at an EYE doctor's office for your own health. Suck it up.
I don't like people near my vagina but I have an annual check up with my gynecologist! Stop whining!

I really need to quit this job!

My faithful husband

The other night,Rich surprised me and took me out to dinner while Lillianna was at a sleep over. We had a lovely meal and I appreciated the effort that he made. We're really trying to add some romance back in our relationship.

After dinner,I mentioned that I had watched an episode of Dr.Phil earlier in the day and a husband cheated on his wife because she didn't clean the house. My loving husband declared,"I'd never cheat on you. I don't have the energy."

I looked at this man who I have been married to for almost 12 years and my mouth dropped open. In my most disbelieving voice I asked,"You mean you wouldn't cheat on me because you're too damn lazy? That's the reason?.....You're supposed to say you wouldn't cheat because I am the love of your life!"

Shocked by his own stupidity,Rich said,"No no! It came out wrong. That's not what I meant!"

Well,there's the key to a happy marriage.....a husband who is too damn lazy to cheat!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Try to remember my name

Writing the post about Kara and her new name reminded of this story.

About a year after I was married,Kara called me at work and left a message with one of the secretaries for me to call her back. The secretary gave me the message and said,"By the way,I thought you'd want to know that she asked for Robin G____."
I laughed. I hadn't been Robin G_____ for a year.

I called Kara back and got her answering machine. I left the following message.

Hi Kara.
This is your sister,Robin P____.
I'm not sure if you remember this but last November,Rich and I had a really big party and we invited our friends and family.
There was lots of food and dancing.

I wore a long,poofy white dress with a veil and Rich was in a snappy black ensemble.
You and some of my friends wore aqua and black velvet gowns. Sound familiar?

Well,during this ceremony,Rich and I said some mushy stuff to each other and gold jewelry was exchanged. At this time,I had a name change. I am no longer Robin G____.
Please try to remember that the next time you call.
Thank you.
Your sister,
Robin P_____.

When she called me back she was laughing and said,"Ya,ya. I get it!"

I just love that girl!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

My funny sister

I went for my last training in Kara and Peter's office today. They will be off on their honeymoon next week and I will be handling things on my own. Kara had me fill out a form for her and it asked the loan officer's name so I put her name on it. Her new name.

When I was finished,she wanted to check it to make sure I didn't miss anything. When she looked at the sheet she gasped this horrible sounding breath. I couldn't imagine what I had done. I hesitantly asked,"What's wrong? What did I do?"

She looked at the first line I had filled in for her.....her name.
"You wrote Kara T____," she shrieked. I frowned at her and said,"Ya. Isn't that what you're going by?" She looked up at me in confusion and surprise and asked,"So soon?" I laughed and said,"You've been married for four days!" She didn't seem to be able to process that information.

New brides......ya gotta love them.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

All talk and no action

I guess that's the best way to describe me. There are so many things that I want to do and yet,I haven't done them. Why? What is stopping me? Asking myself that question is too revealing because it means I have to admit the truth....Again. I'm scared to death of failure. I am and always have been my own worst enemy.

Even as a child,if I got anything less than an A+,I'd be depressed. Mom and Dad were always pleased with my achievements but not me. I always thought I could've done better.I expect a lot from myself.

My dream is to be a writer. Everyone always tells me,"You are a writer. Just writing makes you a writer." I don't really agree with that. I've written one book and have tons of other ideas in my head but sending anything to a publisher means I have to face rejection. Am I up for that? I'm so sensitive. I cry at dog food commercials. How will I handle the "you suck" letter?

I'm not making any promises to myself but I'm hoping I get brave enough to take the next step...any step,very soon.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Should being a Brownie,be this difficult?

Two years ago,after several phone calls to the Girl Scouts of America in our area which resulted in leaving 5 voice mail messages for people who would not call me back, I gave up trying to get Lillianna into a Brownie troop in our town. The website referred me to the phone number,"If you know your party's extension....." Ya, well....I DIDN'T! I couldn't get a live person on the line.

The Boy Scouts had a recruiting table at Lillianna's open house at school but nothing for the girls. I approached the leader and he referred me to the Girl Scout number that I had already called. Everywhere I went was a dead end. Maybe if I had known the secret handshake.....?

In the end,I signed her up for a troop 2 towns away. My friend,Janet was one of the troop leaders and her daughter,Emily was in that troop. Lillianna loved Brownies these past two years but now,Emily is a Girl Scout and Janet stopped being a troop leader. I decided to try to get Lillianna in a troop in our town.....Again.

I sent in the application with the $10 fee back in May. A few weeks ago,I got an email saying she was in a Wednesday troop at 6:00pm. On the application I specifically said she could not meet on Tuesdays or Wednesdays. I work Tuesday nights and Lillianna dances from 4:00pm-5:30pm on Wednesdays. If she joined that troop there would be no time to eat dinner or do her homework.

I emailed back and asked for Monday or Thursday. The reply came that she could be in the Monday troop. This morning,my friend,Sheri told me that she got word that Lillianna was in her troop with her daughter. I breathed a sigh of relief. It didn't even register in my brain when she said it was 1st and 2nd graders. I forgot Lillianna was in 3rd grade.

Sheri checked her roster for me this afternoon and said ALL the girls are 1st graders except the one second grader,her daughter,and the one and only 3rd grader,Lillianna. I was not happy. Lillianna will be nine in 2 weeks. The next oldest is Sheri's daughter who just turned seven. All the others must be 5 and 6.

Of course I sent another email today and the reply said that if enough people sign up tomorrow night,they may start another troop. I think it sucks.
This is ridiculous. Lillianna doesn't want to be with 1st graders and I don't blame her. She should be able to be with girls her own age.

I hate Brownies. It's too damn frustrating!

Sunday, September 17, 2006

My sister's wedding!

Well she did it! Kara is officially married.
The celebration started Thursday night with the rehearsal dinner which was wonderful.
I got to catch up with two of her high school friends who are married to two of her bridesmaids. All the bridesmaids except one,grew up in our house. They didn't actually live with us but they hung out at our house all the time. I loved them all like little sisters. Both of the husbands,were partying teenage boys the last time I saw them. I hadn't seen them in about 14 years because I really don't see the girls that much. It was so fascinating to catch up.

The meal was delicious . The tables were set up in a square so that everyone could be seen. We all got up, one at a time, and said a few words after dinner. There was a lot of laughter and love.

Friday,Lillianna and I met Mom and Kara at 11am for manicures. Then we went to the florist for a look at the flowers. They were gorgeous. After that,we headed over to Bugaboo Creek for a delicious lunch. By that time,we were all exhausted and ready to check into the hotel for a nap.

By 4:00pm,Kara and I were snuggled up in bed watching t.v. with Lillianna in the middle. We fell asleep for a couple of hours and then got ready for dinner. At 7:00pm,Kara's friend/bridesmaid, Jessica met us at the hotel and joined us for dinner. We had a great dinner at T.G.I.Friday's at 8:30pm,which is late for me but right on time for Kara. By the end of the meal,Lillianna was almost asleep.

The whole week before the wedding,the weather forecast predicted rain,no rain,rain,no made us crazy. It was an outside wedding!
Taking the situation into my own hands,I prayed to Daddy,Nana and Papa. "Your baby is getting married. PLEASE do not let it rain." I prayed every day.
The weather was warm,sunny and absolutely lovely.

Kara looked gorgeous. She is always beautiful but can't even describe how she looked. As she walked down the aisle,Peter's eyes lit up and I think I saw him drooling. He almost ran down the aisle to get her to come to him even faster.

Even though I had seen her all morning long,I started to cry when she walked down the aisle. Our baby was getting married.
The day that Mom brought her home,she said to me,"This is your baby too. She's a share baby." I have always been part mom/part sister to Kara and the mom part really took over yesterday.

During the ceremony,T.C.(the best man) and I signed the marriage certificate,which is a Jewish tradition. I remembered when Kara signed mine 12 years ago as my maid of honor. Time sure does fly.

All things considered,I kept my crying to a minimum,although Peter laughed and said,"You did? Every time I looked at you,you were crying!" Mom backed me up on that. I really did hold it together quite well,thank you very much.

The wedding speech turned out great. I didn't write it until the night before the wedding. Peter and I have been going back and forth on how long it could be. He said 30 seconds or less. Ya,ok!! He knew that was never going to happen.

Whenever I did something that Peter liked during the past 10 months,he'd say,"Go ahead and add an extra minute on to your speech." When he irritated me,I'd say,"That'll cost ya. I'm adding another 3 minutes." I put this part in the speech and added,"So,technically speaking,I am entitled to talk for 6 hours. I should also be able to have a slide show presentation on how much I love my sister and a parade in her honor. Since we all want to dance,I'll try to cut it down." Everyone laughed. I got so many compliments on how I am a natural at public speaking:very funny and relaxed. Ahhhhh,if they only knew how uncomfortable I am when I do things like that. It's a good thing that I fooled them all. Even Peter said he loved my speech.
Of course Kara did too. She knows how much I love her and that everything I say is from my heart.

Before the dinner,Lillianna and I said the blessing over the challah in Hebrew. That was cool doing that with her. She looked so precious in her white flower girl dress with her spiral curls and rhinestones in her hair.

We danced until 10:30pm(the wedding started at 3:30pm)and then Kara and Peter headed off in a limo to a hotel in Boston,while me,Rich and Lillianna,Mom and John,went back to the hotel that just the 4 of us had stayed in the night before. We had a suite the first night when it was me,Lillianna,Mom and Kara. Last night,we had an adjoining room to Mom and John's suite. We stayed up talking til midnight with 3 of Mom and John's friends who got a room near ours. Then we went off to bed.

This morning Mom hosted a wedding breakfast for Kara and Peter. It was all Mom's friends and some family. It was beautiful and a nice ending to a spectacular 4 days!

Well,that's enough excitement for me. I have to take some more ibuprofen because my hips and calves are screaming in pain from a whole night of non stop dancing.

Congratulations to my dearest sister and my fabulous new brother in law!!

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Welcome to Bawstin

I received this as an email today but I thought it was funny enough to share it with the blog world.

For those of you who have never been to "Bawstin", this is a good guideline. I hope you will consider coming to "Beantown" in the near future. For those who call New England home, this is just plain great!

Information on Boston and the surrounding area:

There's no school on School Street, no court on Court Street, no dock on Dock Square, no water on Water Street.

Back Bay streets are in alphabetical "oddah": Arlington, Berkeley, Clarendon, Dartmouth, etc.

So are South Boston streets: A, B, C, D, etc.

If the streets are named after trees (e.g. Walnut, Chestnut, Cedar), you're on Beacon Hill.

If they're named after poets, you're in Wellesley.

Massachusetts Ave is Mass Ave; Commonwealth Ave is Comm Ave; South Boston is Southie.

The South End is the South End. East Boston is Eastie. The North End is east of the former West End. Roxbury is The Burry, Jamaica Plain is J.P.

How to say these Massachusetts city names correctly: **Say it wrong, be shunned**

Worcester: Wuhsta (or Wistah)
Gloucester : Glawsta
Leicester: Lesta
Woburn: Wooban
Charlestown: Char-less-town
Dedham : Dedim (like denim w/ a D in the N pace)
Revere: Re-vee-ah
Quincy: Quinzee
Peabody: Peabuddy
Waltham : Walth-ham
Chatham: Chattum

Frappes have ice cream, milkshakes don't.
If it is fizzy and flavored, it's tonic.
Soda is CLUB SODA.
Pop is Dad.
When we want Tonic WATER, we will ask for Tonic WATER.
The smallest beer is a pint.
Scrod is whatever they tell you it is, usually fish. If you paid less than $6/pound, you got scrod.

It's not a water fountain; it's a bubblah.
It's not a trashcan; it's a barrel.
It's not a spucky; it's a sub.
It's not a shopping cart; it's a carriage.
It's not a purse; it's a pocketbook.
They're not franks; they're haht dahgs.
Franks are money in France.

Police don't drive patrol units or black and whites they drive a "crooza".
If you take the bus, you're on the "looza crooza".
It's not a rubber band, it's an elastic.
It's not a traffic circle, it's a rotary.
"Going to the islands" means Martha's Vineyard and Nantucket.
If something's good, it's "pissa". If something's really good, it's "wicked pissa".

The Pats = The Patriots
The Sox = The Red Sox
The C's = The Celtics
The B's = The Bruins

Things not to do:
Don't pahk your cah in Hahvid Yahd .... they'll tow it to Meffa (Medford) or Slumaville (Somerville).
Don't sleep in the Common. (Boston Common)
Don't wear Orange in Southie on St. Patrick's Day.

The underground train is not a subway. It's the "T", and it doesn't run all night (fah chrysakes, this ain't Noo Yawk).

Bostonians think that it's their G-d given right to cut off someone in traffic. Bostonians think that there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (no R's). Bostonians think that three straight days of 90+ temperatures is a heat wave. Bostonians refer to six inches of snow as a "dusting."

For those of you who have never been to "Bawstin", this is a good guideline. I hope you will consider coming to "Beantown" in the near future.

Big poofy hair!

Karen,my hairdresser,colored my hair as usual today and then she styled it just like she will be doing it on Saturday,for Kara's wedding. I love it but I look ridiculous for every day. Of course,I have to work tonight and I feel goofy. I have big poofy hair which will look great when I'm in my gown with dangling earrings and make-up but since I am wearing pants and a top for work,I'm going to be self conscious. I feel like a Minnesota pageant mom with this high hair.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

When the phone rings at midnight

Nothing good has ever come from a call in the middle of the night. I am usually afraid to answer the phone after 9:00pm because everyone knows I am asleep by then. Who would be calling me unless someone is dead or injured? That's what the late night calls are all about.

I got home from work around 8:15pm last night and Rich ended up going out at 9:00pm to help his friend at the radio station with some fantasy football game they were setting up. Lillianna had gone to her friend's house for a birthday sleep over at 6:00pm.
I had asked her to call me before my bedtime,not hers.

Many times when she is at a sleep over,she forgets to call us,so when I was ready for bed at 9:30pm,I didn't worry about not hearing from her.
I had been asleep for over two hours when the phone rang at midnight!

Too sleepy and confused to read the caller I.D.,I hesitantly picked up the phone.

"Hi,Mom," my cheery child chirped. Without waiting for a response from me she continued,"We're watching our third video! I'm having a lot of fun. I'm not even tired yet!"

I yawned and laughed,"I told you to call me before my bedtime. I've been asleep for 2 hours. I have to be up at 4:00am,Noodle."

That really didn't have any impact on my child. She continued to tell me about what Joey the cat was doing and asked me to hold on a minute. The things a mom will do for the love of her child. She finally finished catching me up and I told her to get some sleep. She said she would try.

So,if your phone rings at midnight,it might be your child announcing,"I'm still up!!" even if she had to wake you up to tell you that news.

WWKD? That's the question!

I have seen the WWJD (What Would Jesus Do?)bumper stickers and jewelry everywhere.
This morning,I had to ask myself a very different question,"WWKD?" (What Would Kris Do?)

If you read our DotMoms post from the other day,you would know that Kris had an incident with her coffee and some linty paper towels on the day that we met. She was very calm,cool and collected in spite of her brown coffee stains. She didn't let that interfere with the fun filled day that we had planned.

This morning,as I was driving to work at 6:00am,the straw from my ice coffee drizzled down my white shirt. For a moment,I seriously thought of turning around and going home to change but I didn't want to be late for work. I wanted to scream because nothing looks worse on a white shirt than brown stains.I looked like a cow.

Okay,maybe blood stains on white would be worse but since I wasn't shot or stabbed,the coffee stain seemed quite overwhelming to me. I sighed and thought,"What Would Kris Do?" Of course,I knew exactly what she would do. She would just take a deep breath,enjoy the rest of the drive and take care of it when she got to work.

I didn't cry,whine or throw my coffee out the window. I took a deep breath,listened to my country CD and waited until I got to work. Guess what? The coffee stains came out after I washed them. It was a miracle.

So,if you're ever in a situation that requires a cool head,just ask yourself,"WWKD?" I know that's what helped me!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Connecting the dots in DotMoms

You can read this post over at DotMoms.

Kris and I had a fun time shopping a few weeks ago. We can't wait to meet up again.

You can read Kris' post about our DotMoms post here.

She totally cracks me up. I love that we both write posts about reading posts that are posted elsewhere.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Welcome to my delicious smelling bathroom!

Ever since I was a child,whenever I came home from playing at a friend's house,my mother always asked me how their bathroom was. I always made sure to check it out because I knew there would be a quiz when I walked in the door. If,G-d forbid,I came home and told her the bathroom was not clean,I was never allowed back to that house. If it was a good friend,I prayed they had a maid or a mom who really loved to clean!

Mom kept our bathroom sparkling clean. It was always immaculate.I get so frustrated when I realize I am not my mom and will never have that kind of bathroom.
Oh,Rich and I clean it on a regular basis but it doesn't have that just cleaned,paper banner across the toilet seat, stamp of approval that you get in a nice hotel. That's the kind of bathroom I grew up with.

I guess that's why I am obsessed with air fresheners and candles:not to mask the smell of an unclean bathroom but to enhance the clean smell that tells the world that I am a caring person because my bathroom is so inviting.

I have tried so many air freshners in the past and I have been quite disappointed. A recent purchase was one of the plug ins that is supposed to add a lovely scent to the room for 30 days. Try 30 minutes......or less. Even pulling out the gel pack and inhaling deeply didn't release any apple blossom smell. I was quite unhappy. My bathroom smelled.....empty,except for the minty freshness of our toothpaste. That wasn't quite the scent I was going for.

The other day,I was in the supermarket,looking at all the air fresheners.....again! As I was reading the back of one of them,a woman came by and put 5 of these air fresheners in her cart. I asked her if they really worked. "Oh yes," she said. "I use these all the time in my office bathroom at work. I get lots of compliments on how wonderful the bathroom smells......and it lasts a long time." I thanked her and bought this.

Now my bathroom smells of tropical fruity goodness. It's a pleasure to just walk in there for no reason at all. My bathroom tells you a lot about me. It shows I love my family enough to give them a tropical atmosphere in which to pee and poop. I am such a good mom and wife.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Where can I get an Oompa Loompa?

Willy Wonka really had it easy. He had those Oompa Loompas doing all the hard work.
I've been making chocolates for Kara's wedding for the past 3 hours and I've still got quite a ways to go.

I've made all the bride and groom chocolates,most of the pink hearts and some of the chocolate ovals that say "celebrating love."I may not finish them all today but I have the rest of the week to make them and bag them before we put them in individual heart boxes and tie them up with pink and brown ribbon on Sunday.

So,if you hear of anywhere that I can get an Oompa Loompa,please let me know. I could use the help.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

A surprise reunion

When Lillianna was around 2 years old,I used to go into a women only chat room where I "met" the most wonderful people. We eventually let a few guys in there but they weren't pervs or anything so it was ok. I chatted with these people several times a day while she was napping or playing quietly next to me.

We used to have these sound waves that we could play in the chat so that everyone could hear them. Sometimes someone would type,"This one is for Lillianna," and Lil's favorite wiggle wave would play. It always made her laugh. She would try to type to my friends but it always came out like afdskurpoewihqaifahkdhrakjh;fkadh;i.
Somehow,they always understood and they always answered her.

After two years of chatting,we were over run by "bots" who would come into our room and take it over before we got there. In the end,I figured it was hopeless and I just stopped going in there.

Last Wednesday night,while Lillianna was on the computer,she noticed my messenger that said,"T has signed in." She asked,"Mom,who is 'T'?" I had seen that several times over the past few weeks but I didn't IM her because it had been 6 years since the last time I chatted with her and I wasn't sure if she remembered me. I thought for a moment and then asked Lillianna to scoot out of the chair so that I could IM "T".

I immediately got the response,"Hey CC!" It made my heart stop. No one has called me CC in 6 years. It took me right back to the chat room days. T told me that our chat room was still up and running and had been for all these years. I was stunned. Apparently they moved the room away from the evil bots and continued on. I never knew. I guess they just thought I had moved on.

After a few minutes of chatting with T, it said,"S has entered the chat." All I could type was,"S!!!! are you?????" Then the 3 of us went back and forth trying to catch up. "M has entered the chat." M????? M from Alaska????? I couldn't believe it. I couldn't stop asking questions in an attempt to make up for the past 6 years. "J has entered the chat."
J????J????? OMG!!!!! J was a huge Beanie Baby collector and she insisted on sending Lillianna her Beanie twin which is a dog who was "born" on the same day as Lillianna. She frequently sleeps with Bernie the dog but she never remembered that J from my chat room sent it to her. While Lillianna watched the screen zip by with messages, I explained that J was the one who sent her Bernie. Lillianna's filled up as she said,"I think I'm going to cry." (Ya,she's my daughter!)

"R has entered the chat." R will always have a special place in my heart. The first day I entered the chat room I was so confused. I didn't know what anything meant: LOL,ROFLMAO,BRB,OMG. The screen was zipping by so fast I got dizzy and my eyes dried out because I was afraid that if I blinked,I'd miss something important. R took me under her wing and explained things to me. She was so sweet and understanding. I would never have been able to figure it out without her.

When we last chatted,all those years ago,she was thinking of having a baby. Last Wednesday,I found out she has a 2 year old daughter. I was so happy for her.
Everyone asked me about Lillianna and they guessed her age as 4 or 5. Then someone typed,"Please don't tell me she is 5 already." I typed,"Uhm,well....she'll be 9 next month." M didn't believe it. "I thought she was a few years younger than my daughter." I asked how old her daughter was. She answered,"Eleven." I had to give her an LOL because Lillianna is 2 years younger but it must not have seemed young enough to M. Poor J was bumming out and claimed to be popping Xanax to relax herself since her daughter Little J was 16 and out on a a car....with a boy!!
OY! I don't want to be worrying about that yet. We all sympathized with her.

I chatted with all my old friends for about an hour and then sadly,I had to go to bed because I had to be up at 5am. We made sure that we added each other onto our messenger so that we can chat again soon. I saved the link to our old chat room because I definitely want to talk to the people who weren't in our little messenger chat room last week. That was really so cool.

Have you ever belonged to a chat room?

More than being gay

I recently found out that a co-worker that I have known for several years is a lesbian. She might as well have told me that she bought a new house plant for all the drama that stirred up for me. I just added that to the facts I already know about her: she is upbeat,funny(she has a great laugh!),kind,loving,compassionate and she has the most beautiful hair. I guess that last one is kind of superficial but if you saw her hair,you'd just nod in agreement. Her hair is really gorgeous!

The reason this came up at all was because someone was being petty and wanted to publicly "out" her. I don't understand this mentality at all. That would be like someone trying to "out" me for being Jewish. It's certainly nothing that I hide. I just assume people know and don't really care. I mean,it does come in handy if someone has a question about a holiday or tradition. I never mind the questions.
Why would my being Jewish impact any of my co-workers? I can't imagine that it would. I'm not trying to convert any of them. If I were,then they could certainly take me aside and say,"Hey,keep your religion to yourself. I'm happy with my own,thank you."

That is not the case here. This wonderful person is being made to feel like it's a big deal,in a not so nice way, that she is a lesbian. Is it a big deal that I am Jewish? I've never been made to feel like that. I would be shocked to learn that my co-workers feel that way. I really would.

I think people are so much more than their sexual preference. So very much more.
I have friends who are gay but I don't think of them as my "gay friends" unless I am writing something like this or talking about a gay issue. I could list a million of their qualities and I doubt "gay" would be on the list. It's not a quality,just like a religion is not a quality.

I can't imagine talking about one of my friends and adding their sexual preference in the conversation. "So,me and my friend,Kristy.....who is a heterosexual,were going shopping......" Who needs to know that? I think Kristy's husband,Jerry, is grateful for her sexual preference but who else does this effect? one???

I am very much of the "live and let live" philosophy. I think it would be a happier world if people could just mind their own business and not worry so much about what someone else is doing. Where do they find the time??