Wednesday, May 31, 2006

I hate these flashbacks!

Not to make a mountain out of a molehill but I truly believe that I have post traumatic stress disorder since my pancreatitis attack in November. I have very disturbing flashbacks sometimes and it always sets me on edge.

I can be in the shower shaving my legs and I will flash back to sitting in front of the sink in the hospital,trying to wash myself and brush my teeth.I could barely move. With an I.V. in my arm,I wasn't very flexible. My stomach was so painful, I couldn't bend over to the sink to spit out the toothpaste. For the first few days,it took about 45 minutes for this sponge bath. When I was done,I had to take a nap. I was exhausted.

Whenever I get a stomach pain,I immediately flash back to when I was crying for morphine and the nurse wouldn't come because I wasn't due for another shot for 2 more hours. Every pain that I get now,scares me into thinking the pancreatitis has returned. I can't have a regular stomach ache without feeling that sense of panic.

Today it is hot outside. Really and truly hot. I didn't realize how hot until I walked up to school to pick up Lillianna. By the time I reached her,the sweat was dripping down my face and I could barely catch my breath. I noticed a small pain in my stomach and flashed back to the day before I went to the hospital.

I was so thirsty and hot that day and my stomach felt like someone was chewing my insides. I couldn't get cool and I couldn't quench my thirst. As these thoughts were spinning through my head,I tried to focus on just walking home to put on the air conditioner. I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to do it. Finally,I saw our building and I knew I'd be ok.

I was relieved when I walked through the door. I immediately put both air conditioners on, got a bottle of water and sat on the bed. I feel better now but I have to head outside again. I have errands to run and then I have a mandatory meeting at work. I can't wait to come home and relax.

I wish these flash backs would stop already!

What's cookin' ?

Sixty cupcakes.....that's what! Tomorrow is Ocean Fest at Lillianna's school. The two second grade classes invite their parents to spend the day in school with them and they sing songs,put on a play and guide us through their ocean projects. I heard a rumor that there will be an ocean trivia game pitting the kids against the parents. I'm not sure that I know any facts about the ocean!

The parents were asked to fill out a form and volunteer to bring something for lunch. One of the suggestions was an ocean cake. I crossed that out and wrote that I would make cupcakes with a chocolate sea creature on each one. I have tons of chocolate molds with ocean things on them.

When the woman in charge of the lunch called me last week,she was thrilled to have me make these cupcakes. She said we will need 60: 30 for each lunch.
I made over 60 sea creatures on Monday;starfish,fish,sea horses,sand dollars,conch shells and clam shells. Today I am making funfetti cupcakes with blue frosting (you know,for the ocean!)and a special chocolate ocean pal on the top. This should be fun.

Last night,Rich painted a cutie pie penguin on my t-shirt to wear tomorrow. The teachers have already made t-shirts for each child and I wanted to participate too. I'm that kind of mom!

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I always wanted a dog.....

...... but I didn't actually want to become the dog. Let's just say my perm did not go as well as I had hoped today. I look like a poodle which is exactly what I was trying desperately to avoid.

I tried not to cry when I saw what I looked like. Karen felt bad and put a conditioner in my hair to loosen the curls. She said it will look much better in 2 days. I sure hope she's right.

I wonder how many carbs there are in a dog biscuit? Woof!

Monday, May 29, 2006

Wishful thinking

Lillianna was looking through the huge Rubbermaid storage container in my room today,to find her summer clothes. I decided to look through my drawers to see if I could find my denim shorts from many years ago. I did and they fit. They're a bit big but they're fine. I was feeling pretty good. There was a lot of room in the legs. Last year I squeezed into them and there was no room at all in the legs. This was definitely an improvement.

While I was pulling things out of the drawers, I found a black and white dress that looked familiar but I couldn't place it.I checked the label and it say "L." Ok,well a large was probably a size 18 in plus sizes,right? That seemed reasonable.

Feeling lucky,I went into the bathroom and tried it on. It was a bit tricky but I got into it. Sadly the front didn't button.It didn't even come close to buttoning. I sighed and tried to take it off. After a few wiggles,I realized I was stuck. I called for Lillianna and explained the situation. She tried to pull it over my head. No luck. My wishful thinking got me permanently stuck in a dress. This wasn't supposed to happen!

Like an escape artist trying to get out of a straight jacket,I repositioned my shoulders,wiggled and turned with a few quick moves and....VOILA.....I was out. I breathed a sigh of relief. My next option would've been to cut myself out of the dress. I loved that dress. I didn't want to destroy it!

I stood there holding the dress and tried to remember when and where I had bought it. It finally came to me. I had to laugh. I bought it about 13 or 14 years ago,before I met Rich. I remember trying it on in the dressing room and loving it. I paraded around the house in it. It made me feel so cute and sassy.

The store I bought it in was a hip and happening trendy store for young women. Well,I was a young woman back then! The size "L" probably was a size 12!! I'm getting closer but I am nowhere near that size yet. I've got another 50 pounds to go before I can wear that but believe me, I'm going to wear that dress again!! I'll let you know when that happens. There might even be a picture!

A day of firsts

MY FIRST BREAKFAST

Yesterday,we went to New Hampshire to visit Rich's sister and her family. On the way there,we stopped for breakfast. I haven't eaten breakfast out since my diagnosis of Pancreatitis/Diabetes in November. I've had lunch and dinner out but not breakfast. I decided to take control.

I packed a small container of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Light, sugar free strawberry jam and a small carton of fat free cream in a small lunch box with an ice pack.

I ordered an egg white omelet,dry toast and coffee. (Lillianna and Rich ate the home fries.) It was perfect!! I had everything that I wanted and I didn't feel deprived at all. Plus,I didn't have to go off my eating program.

I also brought food for when I got to my sister-in-law's house. I did eat a hamburg for lunch with a teaspoon of macaroni salad, a teaspoon of potato salad and a lot of regular salad. I ate sugar free jello before that since I was starving and lunch wasn't ready yet. For dessert,instead of birthday cake,I ate one of my sugar free oatmeal cookies. (Three cookies is one serving.)

Dinner was a repeat of lunch and I couldn't eat 2 hamburgs in one day. Too much fat for me. I heated up the chicken,broccoli and low carb pasta that I had brought. I had a heaping bowl of salad so that I would stay away from the macaroni salad and potato salad that I had sampled earlier.

At dessert time,I had a cup of coffee with one more sugar free cookie. I was pleased with my day. I had a fun time with my family which was great but the important thing was that I was in complete control of my food.

When we got home at 11:30pm,I checked my blood sugar. It was 134. Pretty darn good! I was very proud of myself!!

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LILLIANNA'S FIRST HAMBURG!

Lillianna is a picky eater like Rich. This year,she has started to eat steak after years of not eating meat other than chicken nuggets.(Who knows if nuggets are really even a food??)

Yesterday,my brother-in-law grilled hot dogs,hot links and hamburgs. I walked over to Lillianna with great hope in my heart and told her the menu. Then I asked,"Would you like to try a hamburg? It's just steak in a patty."

She didn't even hesitate when she said,"Sure." I almost fell over from shock,
I made her a sandwich with some lettuce and she gobbled it all up.
My child at her first hamburg!!!!.......and she liked it!!

This is a news flash in our family. It's the unthinkable. Lillianna is really branching out. We are all so proud of her!! She even had a half of another burger for dinner. Wonders will never cease!

Forever fifty-one

May 21st would've been Dad's 70th birthday. You can read this post over at DotMoms.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Shopping trip update

Well,I did it. I shopped 'til I dropped! Lillianna sat patiently in the dressing room while I tried on clothes,got more,tried on more,got more again and tried those on.It took two hours!!

I bought 2 bras,which thrilled me! I have been buying my bras in Lady Grace for years since no regular store carries the size I need. It's sad.....really it is. Today I felt normal for the first time in a long time just because I could buy my bras off the rack!

I also bought 2 cute shirts.They're the ones that are supposed to be worn wrinkled. Lillianna asked me how I was going to fight the urge to iron them. I'm not sure about that but I think I can do it. They look good wrinkled.

I bought 2 pairs of jeans;one long and one capris....or is it capri? Well,whatever. You know what I mean. I also bought 3 pants that were all the same style. Although I won't say what size they were,I will say that they are a size I haven't worn in 13 years. I think the pants I wore to pick Rich up at the airport in October 1993 were the same size and I haven't been that size since! I'll admit they are a tiny bit snug but the next size up were way too baggy and Lillianna gave me a look as she tugged at the excess material and shook her head. So,I bought the smaller size. I think if I lose 3-5 more pounds they'll be perfect.

So,that was my shopping trip. I feel happy and proud. Lillianna hugged me and her hands got all the way around me. Whenever she hugs me and almost touches her hand she says,"You're getting there." Today,I got there.

While I was heating up dinner in the kitchen she said,"You know,Mom,I'm really proud of you for doing so well and losing the weight." We focus on the fact that I am much healthier now because of the way I eat and exercise and I will never go back to my unhealthy ways. All in all,today was a very tiring but wonderful day.

Shopping trip

Over the past 7 months, I have bought one pair of pants and 3 t-shirts for myself. Right now,those are the only clothes that actually fit me. Luckily, I had clothes in my closet that were a smaller size than I was in November and they still had the tags on them,so they were new to me. I thought I looked ok in them until Kara saw me at Lillianna's recital last weekend. She gave me the once over,laughed,and said,"You have to buy some new clothes. Those are way too big on you!"

Sometimes I don't realize how big a difference losing 49 pounds has made. I often look in the mirror and just see this overweight person who needs to lose another 50+ pounds. The reality is,49 pounds is a lot of weight. Lillianna weighs 52 pounds. When I look at her and realize I basically lost the weight of my 8 year old child,it kind of puts it in perspective.

After school today,we are heading to Wal-Mart so that I can buy a pair of jeans, a couple of pair of pants and maybe a couple of shirts. This is my first shopping trip in a long time and I am nervous and excited.

I'll let you know how it turns out!

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Rewarding negative behavior

I never do it! I don't believe in giving Lillianna a "treat" of any kind when she misbehaves. I don't coax her into behaving properly with promises like,"If you stop crying,I'll buy you __________,"(fill in the blank) or, "If you pick up your toys,I'll make you an ice cream sundae." If I ask her to do something then she needs to do it. There is no negotiating.

If she is behaving badly,I usually threaten to take something away: her next Brownie meeting, her next dance lesson,a birthday party or her favorite show.This has never failed in 8 years. The key is that she knows I mean what I say.

I have often said I just don't have the patience to raise a brat. Sadly,some moms have more patience than I do and I think we all suffer for that.

I just got back from the supermarket after picking up a few items. As I walked down the first aisle,I encountered a mom with her 4 year old son who was already wiggling out of the cart. She tried to get him to sit down and as he did,he decided to become an ambulance siren. He made a loud Woowoowoowoowooo which made my head spin. The mom said nothing.

In an effort to quiet her son,she asked a store employee to go to the bakery and get her son some free cookies. The older gentleman walked briskly to the other side of the store. As I approached the middle of the store,I saw him handing the boy 3 cookies. He quieted down.

Nice lesson that boy taught his mom. Give me snacks or I will make enough noise to give you a migraine.

Who do you think is in control in that family??

Monday, May 22, 2006

Being rude!

Last year or the year before,I entered a Rude Contest. I had to submit a story about the rudest thing that had ever happened to me. Sadly, I had more than one. I received an email from the head of this contest saying that she doesn't usually respond to the contestants personally but she loved the stories that I submitted and she wished me luck in the contest. I didn't win. I didn't even think the top winners had funny stories. Oh well. That's life.

I was just going through my folders and found my submission so I figured I would share them here. Why let the rudeness go to waste??

1)When I was 25 I worked for an optical shop. A man in his late sixties came in to pick up his eyeglasses. As I gave the glasses a final adjustment the man glared at my name tag.

"Robin," he said slowly as he glared at me. "So, do you go bob bob bobbin' along?"

I tried to ignore him as I put his glasses in the leather case. Not taking my silence as any kind of hint he continued, "So, Robin, do you have a red breast?" I put his glasses on the counter and walked in the back room.


2)Back in the early 90's, ribbed pants with matching tops were all the fashion rage. I was coaching my sister's high school cheerleading squad at the time and as a gift the girls gave me a matching ribbed outfit. I loved it and everyone said how great I looked in it. One day I wore it to work at the ophthalmology practice where I worked as a technician. I had just finished an eye exam for a gentleman in his 70s when he asked, "So, when are you due?"

Confused by his question I asked, "Due for what?"

He pointed to my stomach."When are you due?"

Finally understanding his question, I was horrified. "I'm not pregnant!" I replied angrily.

"Yes, you are," he said in a matter-of-fact tone.

Knowing 100% that I was not pregnant, I said,"I am definitely not pregnant!" Not giving up and becoming angry, he said,"I am never wrong about these things and you ARE pregnant! Just look at your clothes!"

I looked him straight in the eye and gasped, "My clothes? This is the latest fashion!"

"Hmmmph," he snorted. "Latest fashion? You don't know anything about fashion! That is an ugly outfit and you should never wear it again!" And with that last remark he stomped off.


3)While working in an ophthalmology practice, I called a patient into the exam room to see her doctor. A grumpy woman in her late 70s muttered under her breath as I pointed her towards the exam chair. Before I left the room she barked at me, "Well, what is your name?" she asked as she pointed a wagging finger at me.

I smiled as politely as I could and replied, "Robin."

She began to sputter. "Robin? Robin? What kind of name is Robin? What was your mother reading ,a dime store novel when she named you?"


4)A patient in his 50s came in for a quick follow up visit with the ophthalmologist that I work for. All I had to do was check his vision and find out if his chronic eye problem was improving. As soon as I called his name in the waiting room, I could tell he was going to be a challenge. Every question was answered with a sarcastic tone.

"How is your eye feeling?" I asked.

"You tell me," he grumbled.

"Do you feel like your vision has gotten any better?"

"You tell me," he repeated.

I gave him the occluder to hold on his nose which blocks one eye at a time so that the vision can be checked. He stuck the handle on the top of his head and rolled his eyes at me. After a difficult time checking his vision, I asked him if he had any health changes since his last visit. He said he had been diagnosed with rectal-itis. I had never heard of this before so I asked when he was diagnosed. He said at the last visit with his eye doctor.I really began to doubt him but I finally gave in and asked,
"What is that?" He smirked at me and said, "It's a disease that starts in your eye and it gives you a crappy attitude towards life!"


What's the rudest comment you've encountered?

How did this happen?

This post is over at The Lighter Side.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Lillianna's dance recital

Today was Lillianna's dance recital. As usual, I cried through the first dance. She was dressed in white jazz pants with silver glitter,a matching white top which had sort of a sleeve on the left shoulder and a spaghetti strap on the right shoulder and a headband of white poofy feathers. She tap danced to Polar Express.

It was such an upbeat and advanced number and it made me happy that I had switched her into the "older" class this past year. It's always a challenge to actually see her through the blur of my tears but I do my best. Later in the car I asked her,"Do you ever think there will be a time when I won't cry at your recital?" Lillianna answered sarcastically,"I wouldn't count on it!" Ya,she's probably right.

Her ballet dance was beautiful. It's amazing how far these girls have come in five years. Some of the same numbers for the little ones get repeated year after year so when "Wake up, Warm up" was done by the 4 year olds,I looked over to Lillianna and said, "I remember when you did this." Apparently she doesn't remember at all so I will have to show her the scrap book I made of her first recital that has her doing that dance.

Her jazz dance was very jazzy indeed as she danced to "The Witch Doctor." You know,the one that goes, "ooh eeh ooh ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang...." All the girls were right in step,shaking their hips,making jazz squares and smiling all the while. My heart just burst with pride.

The finale was "We're all in this together," from High School Musical. I was kind of sad to see it all end. My mom said,"Thank G-d she can dance!" There seemed to be quite a few kids,many older than Lillianna,who didn't know what they were doing and they looked quite uncomfortable being on stage. Lillianna practices her dance steps any time she has floor space and she simply loves to be on stage!

Well,we have about nine more recitals to go before she graduates high school. I don't want to think about how many tissues I'll go through on that day. I'll just take them one year at a time and savor each recital as it comes.

I'm very proud of you,Lillianna. As usual,you were a super star!

Friday, May 19, 2006

I have seen the enemy and it's name is Pollen!

I have been really lucky this year (knock on wood) because I didn't have the 3 sinus infections/flu that I get every winter. I chalk that up to the Pneumonia shot and Flu shot that the nurse practioner made me get in December. She said that it's worse being sick when you have diabetes so she strongly suggested I get both. I did.

So here we are in May,five months after my shots. I stayed healthy all winter but yesterday at work,I started to feel congested and my throat hurt. This morning I got out of bed at 3:30am due to my post nasal drip which caused excessive choking and coughing.My ears are blocked. My nose is stuffy and my throat is still dripping.I think it is due to the high pollen count. Damn pollen!!

I have been using my prescription nasal spray,Sudafed and sugar free Robitussin cough syrup. That usually gets me back on track. I sure hope it works fast since Lillianna's dance recital is at 12:30pm tomorrow.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Not a good morning

This morning was not my best morning.

#1.....Lillianna "forgot" to read for 20 minutes yesterday which is part of her daily homework and has been since September. If she doesn't bring in a reading slip signed by me with how many minutes she read for,she has to sit at her desk with her head down and lose 5 minutes of recess.

When she realized this,she went crazy. She threw a tantrum and then blamed me and Rich because we didn't "let" her read. Uhm,well...she had 3 1/2 hours to do this while she was at my Mom's house yesterday and another 2 hours once she came home.She reminded Rich at 9pm that she had to read.

Long story short:my morning started out with hysteria! Not the way I wanted to begin my day.

#2......I wanted to walk Lillianna to school today to calm her down and to get my 30 minute walk in before heading to the gym to work on the Nautilus equipment. Her tantrum took longer than I had thought so when we got to school,it was a ghost town. A tumbleweed greeted us at the crosswalk....no crossing guard. Crap! We were late. I brought Lillianna into the office and they gave her a late pass. I walked back home.

#3......I walked up to the gym after breakfast. I remembered how to use the ab cruncher but I wasn't sure about the rest of the stuff. I went downstairs to the office and asked if someone could come up and review the equipment with me. No one can help me until Monday. I walked back home.

I will walk another 30 minutes when I get Lillianna this afternoon but I felt like a loser and that I wasted my time.

#4.....I called my mechanic because my engine light is back on even though they cleared it last week. It will cost over $300 to have it fixed. I have to have it done.

I want to cry or eat something but since I don't binge eat anymore,I have no way to vent my frustration and sadness. Oh,Chinese food,where are you when I need you?

I hope this day gets better!!

Monday, May 15, 2006

The Brownie autograph book

Today was Lillianna's last Brownie troop meeting. The girls make an autograph book on the last day and everyone signs it. Four of the girls are moving on to Girl Scouts next year and Lillianna will be joining a Brownie troop in our own town instead of the one that is two towns away.

I opened her autograph book to see what her friends wrote and on the first page one of the girls wrote:

Lilly,
I will miss you because you have been nice to me and have never been mean to me.


That broke my heart. It makes it sound like people have not been nice to her and if that's true,it is too painful to think about.She is only 9 years old.

I showed this to one of the troop leaders and told her who wrote it and she said,"Yes,she has had a very hard life. She has really been through a lot."
I don't know all the details but this really broke my heart.

Lillianna's quote of the day

I was in the kitchen washing the dishes before dinner when Lillianna came in and hugged me.
"You're the best mom,ever," she said as she squeezed me tightly. Before I could reply she said,"You deserve to have a daughter like me!" I laughed as I kissed the top of her head. She's right!

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

My mother's day resolution

Every January 1st, I make one New Year's resolution. I try to make it something reasonable because otherwise,I will just set myself up to fail.

This morning I decided to straighten things up a bit so that when we come home tonight,we won't be walking in to a mess. Rich cleaned up this weekend but this morning I threw dishes in the sink that I didn't wash until 1pm. I finally put the laundry away and I cleaned the bathroom.

The New Year's resolution that I made last year that I had trouble keeping was "clean up as I go along." Messy + busy= disaster. I run through this place like a tornado sometimes,rushing from one activity to the other. I throw things and let them fall where they may as I dash out the door again. When I return,it looks like the apartment was burglarized.

After I cleaned today,I looked around and thought,"Hey,that wasn't so bad!" I decided to make a Mother's Day resolution to be a neater and more organized mom. I'm going to do my best to keep this.

What mom resolution would you make this Mother's Day?

My shortest post

I hate two-faced people!! That's all I want to say.

Monday, May 08, 2006

A trip to the gym

Well, I am on my way to the gym in our apartment complex. Someone is going to show me how to use the equipment in just 20 minutes. I have never gone to a gym before because I hate working out. I joined a gym years ago so that I could attend the step aerobics class but that's all I did. This will be "for real."

I took a weight lifting class in college but....well.....I didn't lift anything. Tony was the instructor and he was my roommate Kyra's boyfriend. Kyra and I dressed up in matching sweat suits,make-up and jewelry with our hair perfectly done and we walked like a princess to the gym. We listened to Tony talk for 5 minutes then we told him we were going to the student union for coffee and donuts.

Sometimes,out of guilt,we actually used the equipment for 5 minutes before leaving but many times,Kyra kissed Tony and before he could say no,we were gone. We both got an "A" in that class. It's not fair,I know,but she was sleeping with the teacher,afterall!

Today's trip to the gym isn't for a grade. It's to keep me healthy and to tone the wiggly skin from losing 46 pounds. I am hoping to lose another 30 pounds by my sister Kara's wedding in September. I just hope I can stay on the machines for more than 5 seconds without hating it.



(Update: I did the treadmill,bike and elliptical. I crunched my abs,strengthened my arms,biceps,triceps and something called latts??? I stretched my hamstrings and lifted weights. My legs feel like limp noodles. I can't wait to go back tomorrow!!!!)

Friday, May 05, 2006

When will it get better?

I have been hanging on for years. When I realized we needed more money 3 1/2 years ago I got another job. Between the two of them I work 30 hours a week. I am also a stay-at-home mom if it doesn't matter that I don't really stay at home. I work around Lillianna's school time and I am gone all weekend but I am home every day after school for her.
Rich works 40 hours a week at a job he hates but he hasn't found anything better in the past 3 years.

Today,I was bombarded with bills and I nearly burst into tears. Everyone wants my money and I just don't have it to give,no matter how hard we work. I still have a pending doctor's bill from when I was sick in Florida in November. I am being billed by one of my jobs for an exam that I had there even though every other exam in the past 16 years has been free. Now they say my insurance won't pay and I need to pay it. So much for that perk! It's the last one they offered and now that's gone! Lillianna's pediatrician just sent me a bill from March for the balance of a strep test.The bills just go on and on.

It's very depressing and Rich always promises that it's going to get better. I always believe him and then things stay the same or get worse.I need to know when will it get better?

How do you deal with being overwhelmed by bills?

(Hula,if you read this...please don't tell me to do the bills naked....too many paper cuts!)

Thank goodness for music

Today is a beautiful day. They say it could be in the 80's. All our windows are open and I guess I'm ready to start getting my chores done. After I feed the goats and milk the cows.....oh...never mind....it just looks like barnyard animals live here!

Actually,I have to stir fry my veggies and make chicken cutlets with lemon sauce for my weekend meals. Then I have to clean this messy place up before I leave at 2:15pm to walk up to school to get Lillianna.

After that,she has her formal recital pictures scheduled at 4pm. I will have to re-do what's left of her curls,get her in her costume and do her make-up before we head off to the dance studio.

I have my favorite country CD playing in our DVD player and now I will cook and clean to music. Wish me luck......I hate to clean!!

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Curlers in your hair......shame on you!

Is there anyone old enough to remember that commercial? I'm not even sure what they were advertising....maybe it was Lilt home perm? Anyway,for Lillianna's first dance recital,five years ago,I curled her hair. I did the same thing for her 2nd recital. The past two years she has put her foot down and said she wanted it straight. I held off on the curlers because I am a mom who listens to her child...until this year.

Lillianna will have her formal recital portrait taken at dancing school tomorrow.She is now sitting on my bed in her baby doll pajamas,munching on a chocolate rice cake, and all I can see are the big pink curlers in her hair. She looks adorable!

Tonight will be a lumpy sleep for her but I guess that's the price of beauty,right?

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

The challenge of homework

Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am an intelligent human being when it comes to figuring out Lillianna's homework. Today's post about homework is over at DotMoms.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Are you kidding me with this??

This post is over at The Lighter Side.
If you have seen this commercial,please tell me what the beginning is! Thanks.

Monday, May 01, 2006

I'm not in the circus so why am I required to juggle?

I looked at the calendar today and it stressed me out. May is going to be a very busy month for us. I work Thursday and Saturday mornings as an ophthalmic technician and if I have to take off one of those days,I try to make it up on another day so that I don't lose the money. I don't love this job but the money is good and I've worked here for 16 years.

Next week,I am chaperoning Lillianna's field trip so I took Thursday off and then I had to take Saturday morning off too for her dancing school dress rehearsal. I also volunteer in her class that Friday morning for computer class. When I looked at the calendar,I couldn't make sense of it.

The only day to make up Thursday and Saturday would be Friday and I would have to work 8 hours instead of 4. That means not volunteering Friday and checking with the mom who shares this day with me and make sure she is going to be in school for the kids that day. Then I will have to ask my mom to pick Lillianna up from school and bring her to her house until I get there at 5:15pm.

The whole month looks like that. I have to keep juggling days in order to do what I need to do for Lillianna and still keep my hours the same at work. We can't afford any loss in pay. I asked Rich if he could pick up some extra overtime at work so hopefully that will take the burden and stress off of me during this time.

How do you handle a busy schedule?