Just in case

It's often on my mind that Rich was only 4 years old when his mother died. His siblings were 2,6 and 8 years old. Their mom was only 27. The "kids" never recovered from the sudden death of their mother. She was gone before she could make a life time of memories with them. That always makes me so sad.

I am in no way saying that mothers are better than fathers, but in my opinion, a child needs a mother. There are so many things that moms do that dads just don't do. In a perfect world a child would have 2 loving parents because each person brings something different to the child's life.

In our family, Rich is the one who takes Lillianna on walks to an old cemetery in town to read the historical grave stones. He plays endless board games with her. He taught her to play marbles. He taught her to paint. He is helping her learn to play the guitar. He war games with her. He takes her bowling and to the movies on the weekend when I am at work. He is trying to teach her to ride her bike without training wheels but she is still hesitant about that.

I am the one who talks to her about everything. We talk about keeping safe, we talk about not drinking alcohol or taking drugs. We talk about puberty.Anything that is on her mind becomes an open discussion. I am the one who cuddles in bed with her in the middle of the day as we read Junie B.Jones books together. I take her to the pool and swim with her for hours. I take her on surprise trips for ice cream or to Build-A-Bear workshop to pick up something special for her 2 dogs,Kaleigh and Michaela. I go on her field trips from school or from Brownies.

Neither one of us can do it all. It takes both of us to pull this off.
I always worry about dying. I don't obsess over this....much, but it does pop up from time to time.

Yesterday,one of the doctors that I work for,had a heart attack. I had thought he was in good health. He eats right and exercises all the time. Still, he had a heart attack. That threw it all in my face again. I try to eat right, but I am not always successful. I have been trying to exercise but I haven't been doing well with that.
Here is this doctor,who I thought was in great health and he had a heart attack. Luckily he is doing well today but it has me worried.

What if something happens to me before I am done raising Lillianna? Keep in mind that I won't be "done" until she is well into her fifties....and then some!
I was wondering if I should write a book for her "just in case," like my thoughts on dating,sex,graduation from high school,college,marriage,her first child....things like that.

I fully expect to live to be at least 85 but just in case,I am wondering if she will remember how much I love her and how special she has always been to me. Of course she hears this a million times a day from me but she is only 7. Will what I say today be remembered 20 years from now if something were to happen to me tomorrow? I try to live life to the fullest because life is short and you never know how long you have but I feel like a need a safety net.

Have you ever written something for your child "just in case"?