Say Cheese!

Yesterday my furry nephew,Cody,turned 2. Today Kara threw him a little birthday party with her 2 step daughters,Lena and Bella and me and Lillianna. I guess not everyone throws a party for their chocolate lab but Cody is Kara's one true love (sorry Peter) and damn it,he was getting a party.

Last night Lena slept over here and I had the girls make chocolate covered strawberry marshmallows and chocolate dog bones and paw prints. I had the dog bone mold from Lillianna's Scooby Doo birthday and the paw prints from her Blue's Clues birthday several years ago. We put together a little chocolate platter to bring to Cody's party in honor of his special day.

When it came time for cake,Kara commanded Cody to sit in the dining room chair so that he was close to his birthday cake on the table. Cody is no lap dog although he will sit in your lap when you tell him too. He is an 80 pound bear!

So there we were all gathered around the big dining room table and Kara had me and the 3 girls stand around Cody so that she could get a picture...well several pictures. He was really a good sport about all this. I asked Kara if she wanted me to take a picture of her with her "baby" and she did.

What made me think I was smart enough to use a digital camera? Kara and the kids were hugging Cody and smiling at me as I attempted to push a button.
"Hold it down!" Kara instructed. I did. The screen went blank. Kara gave me a pitiful look and asked,"You shut it off,didn't you?" I said I did.

Then she told me to put it back on and hold the other button down. Oh...well why didn't she say that in the first place? I got them all in focus again and pushed the other button. Nothing happened. Kara yelled,"Hold it down!" I did. Something flashed. I pushed again. Flash flash. By that time Kara was just shaking her head at me and I burst into a fit of laughter. Then we were all laughing. In the end I think Lillianna took the picture.

The kids left the dining room and Kara decided she hadn't taken enough pictures of the chocolates. She put 2 big milk chocolate dog bones on the white frosted cake and took a picture. As they were lying there I said,"They kind of look like penises." She laughed and said,"You're right....they do!" When she removed them,the chocolate penises were covered in white frosting. I'll spare you Kara's comment about that.

So all in all,Cody had a very happy birthday and the day was filled with sugar and fun!

My body is smarter than I am

No matter what I do,I can't fool my body. If I over carb,my blood sugar goes up whether I think it will or not. I guess I keep hoping my body will give me the benefit of the doubt and keep my blood sugar in a good range. How did I think that would happen?

Yesterday I toasted a whole grain bagel,slapped some 1/3 less fat cream cheese on it,grabbed my cup of coffee and ran out the door to bring Lillianna to school before eating my breakfast on the 30 minute drive to work. Two hours after eating, my blood sugar was 155. Of course it was. I over carbed and I knew it. Who was I really trying to fool?

After talking to a newly diagnosed diabetic yesterday I realized that I was once newly diagnosed too. My focus was to get myself into a healthy range and I did. That time passed and I got lazy. I gained some weight back and went into denial about food. If I want it I eat it and hope my sugar will be okay.I'm not only lazy but really stupid.

There was a guy on the radio yesterday talking about life changes. He said not to cut out all things that are yummy but just to cut down a bit and the weight would come off slowly. That would be something I could stick to.

This morning,I toasted half of the whole grain bagel and put peanut butter and sugar free jam on it. Two hours after eating,my sugar was 105...50 points lower than yesterday at the same time. Just by cutting down the carbs I could see a change. Honestly,after the half of bagel I was stuffed. I don't know how I ate the whole bagel yesterday. Well,that's not true....I know I eat without any thought. That's part of my problem.

I can't pledge that I'm going to make smart decisions every day but I'm sure going to try to make smarter decisions than I have in the past year.

Why am I so tired?

The past two or three weeks have been hell for me. I'm totally exhausted every day. It doesn't matter how much sleep I get because I still wake up tired.
Usually after I get home from work and pick Lillianna up at school,I fall asleep on the couch for 2 hours before I make dinner. It's not that I'm just a little sleepy. I can't stay awake. I close my eyes for a second and two hours go by.

Today I had to shower and go food shopping but I kept falling asleep for 10 minutes or so and just when I thought I'd head into the shower,I'd have to nap again. I didn't shower until 4pm!

I googled the side effects of my blood pressure med that was increased from 10mg to 20mg several weeks ago and fatigue is one of them. I think I'll call my doctor on Monday. She had me take a blood test to check what kind of anemia I have but I never heard back from her. I think between the anemia and bp med increase I'm always one second away from napping. Not a good thing at all.

A special kind of hell

I was just watching the news and once again they were talking about the abuse case of a local 7 year old boy. His mother's boyfriend burned his genitals with a cigarette,beat him with a belt and urinated on his head. According to the story,the boy told his mother who instructed him to keep this quiet.

Fortunately this boy reported the abuse to the school nurse and DSS was brought it. The mother and boyfriend are in custody.

My parents never hit me and Lillianna has never been hit. Who would hit their child?
I don't understand this at all and I probably never will.

I hug and kiss Lillianna a million times a day and she is always in my lap wanting to be snuggled. Today she had some aches and pains so I gave her some children's tylenol and I heated up my heating pad for her. She thanked me for taking care of her. I can't imagine not taking care of my child.

I hope there is a special kind of hell for child abusers.....I really do!

Profiling

I was listening to talk radio this morning on the way to work and the topic was profiling at the airport. I never want to offend anyone but I'm tired of everyone trying to be politically correct. When it comes to airport safety I think profiling is a no-brainer.

I know that many groups feel that they are being harassed and singled out but here's the reality.....if a group of white Jewish moms in their mid 40s threaten the safety of the USA or the world then I would expect that security would pull me out of line and question me before letting me board my plane. I fit the profile.

Apparently there is some law suit going on in Israel about profiling and I think it's ridiculous. I've flown El-Al several times and the reason they haven't had their planes blown up is because of their meticulous security. There are a lot of people out to destroy Israel and the Israeli people and for the most part they belong to a certain group. I hope Israel continues to profile their airline passengers. It's been working so far!

A nice smooth shave?

Kara just got back from visiting Mom in Florida. They had a lot of fun even though Kara ran Mom ragged with all the activities that they did. I told Mom it serves her right for having such a young daughter! She has to learn to keep up.

I'm the low key type. Lillianna and I have been to visit Mom only twice in 10 years but our vacations don't include late nights. I think Lillianna could've stayed out late but I like to be in bed nice and early and then get up around 5am and have coffee on the balcony and watch the sun come up. Kara is just getting home when the sun comes up.

One day during Kara's visit,Mom came out of the shower and told Kara that she used her razor to shave her legs because hers was so dull it wouldn't even work. Kara said okay and didn't think much about it. Later that day at the beach,Mom looked at her legs and said,"Wow! I missed a lot when I shaved." Kara looked at Mom's legs and asked,"Did you take the white plastic covering off the razor before you used it?"
Mom asked,"What cover?"

After the two of them calmed down from their fit of hysterical laughter,Mom realized she shaved with the plastic cover on. She probably should've just braided the hair on her legs! When they got home,Kara checked to see if Mom's dull razor had a plastic cover on it too. Nope....but the blade was upside down. That's why it didn't work.

Once again I asked Mom,"If you ever have any memory problems how the hell am I going to know?????" That just made Mom laugh. I can only shake my head.

Thank goodness she'll be home in just a few weeks. I love the six months when she lives in Massachusetts. That woman just cracks me up! I'll have to check her legs out when she gets here!

Passionate about what?

I met a patient today who was quite interesting and very passionate about her new career choice. She is going to culinary school. When she spoke about this her whole face just glowed.

Oh sure,I get like that when I think about eating food but preparing it? I hate to cook. I thought I did well making turkey bacon and chocolate chip pancakes for dinner tonight. It's quite a combo but Lillianna loves it!

On the way home I started to think about a job that I have a passion for. Out of all the jobs I've had, not one of them made me feel like I had found my true calling.

I entered college majoring in journalism and then I couldn't get one single journalism class my freshman year. I started taking classes in Hotel,Restaurant,Travel administration and I found them to be fascinating. After 3 semesters of this,my adviser said I couldn't change my major to HRTA and he advised me to transfer to another college. So much for getting good grades and passing everything he wanted me to. It didn't help.

I took a travel course and worked in charter travel for 3 years before living in Israel for 2 years. When I came home from Israel my father died and I fell into a job with an optometrist. After 3 years of that I started working for the company that I have now been at for 17 years and here I am!

I like this job because I make good money and I can work around Lillianna's school schedule. Basically,it's convenient. Do I love it? Heck no. I hate people and I hate whining people most of all. Did I mention how much I hate kids as patients? I just have to block it out and realize this lovely skill of mine pays the bills.

So where's my passion? Twenty minutes into my drive home it hit me. The one thing that I am absolutely passionate about is being a mother. I love it. It makes me so happy. I am completely in tune with Lillianna and I enjoy everything I do with her. Okay,I hate cooking but the kid is still alive after 10 years so I haven't starved her to death.

At first I was sad that I wasn't passionate about my job but when I looked at the right job,I realized I was very passionate about it. I found my true calling after all!

I nagged for no reason!

This past Saturday I picked up our completed tax forms at the tax office. In the past,Rich was the one to go and get the taxes done since I used to work 13 hours every Saturday up until last May. This year I just dropped them off and they called 2days later to say I could pick them up. I love things that are mindless.

Each day since then I have left the tax packet on the dining room table asking Rich to please sign the forms so I could mail them in. We're getting a refund and I want the money in a timely fashion. I've got stuff to pay with that money.

Since our jobs are so opposite,we're like 2 ships that pass in the night. We only see each other for a short time in the morning and then most nights he gets home when I'm asleep. Since I can budget my time fairly well I always leave room to nag at him. I feel it's my duty as a loving wife.

So again,this morning,I gently reminded him to sign the damn tax papers. I might have threatened his life but I can't confirm that. I have PMS.....I could've said anything!

When I got home from work I checked my mail. There was something from the IRS in there. All I could think was,"CRAP! Did they find a mistake on my taxes?" Then I remembered they're still on the freakin' table unsigned!! Nervously I opened the envelope and voila! My state refund.

I called the tax office and asked if they filed it electronically. She said she did. Then she laughed hysterically at how I nagged my poor husband for a week when there was no reason to nag him at all!

I probably should apologize......ya....I doubt that's gonna happen!

Hebrew School

Hebrew school was an interesting thing in my family when I was a child. My mother's brother had 2 sons and a daughter and my father's brother had 2 sons and a daughter. The boys were automatically sent to Hebrew School but the girls were not.

Papa,Mom's dad, belonged to an Orthodox temple although Nana,Mom and Uncle Louis were not really religious. When I was around 5 years old, Papa asked me if I wanted to go to Sunday school with my cousins Evan who was 9 and Jeff who was 6. I jumped at the chance.

Although the boys were kind of bored,I loved it! I learned songs in Hebrew and I was hooked. When we moved to a new town,Papa asked me if I wanted to go to Hebrew school in my town and not be with my cousins anymore. I didn't care who I was with I just wanted to learn Hebrew. Mom said I didn't have to go if I didn't want to. I didn't know why anyone would not want to go.

I thought Hebrew was a magical language and I loved learning it. The big finale was my Bat Mitzvah in 1976. Ya,I'm that old. You can read about that here.

So here we are in 2008 and I haven't joined a temple or sent Lillianna to Hebrew school yet. By chance,I started talking to her friend's mom at a birthday party a few weeks ago and she asked me if we belonged to a temple. I told her that they're so expensive and I didn't think I could afford it.

She told me about her temple which is 30 minutes from where we live but it sounded affordable. She said the people were really welcoming.
Long story short,(as if that's possible!!)Lillianna and I went with Nancy and her daughter Lauren to Hebrew School last Monday and last night and it's great!!

The moms stay for the class and help their child. It's a requirement of the class and I totally dig that,I tell ya. Lillianna went from not knowing one single thing last week to reciting her numbers 1-10 flawlessly last night. I was so proud. I taught her well. I had to recite them too which I thought was funny but very cool.

We will be attending a service on Friday night which will be fun. I love Shabbat services. I want Lillianna to know what it is to be Jewish.

The crazy part is that Mom is not supportive. She said we can't afford to join and she isn't happy with my decision. My sister Kara is 100% supportive and said that she regrets not going to Hebrew School. I used to take her to services with me all the time and I tried to teach her about all the holidays but she didn't push to go the way that I had and Mom didn't think it was necessary for Kara to go. I recently got an email from my cousin Marcia and she said she also regrets not going to Hebrew School. I know I've made the right decision.

Even though it is very disappointing to me that Mom isn't thrilled about my decision,I told Lillianna that when you know you're making the right choice,even though some people may not approve,you just gotta stick with it.

It feels great to be back in the temple again! It really does!