Santa is too fat???? Are you kidding me??

I was watching t.v. in Tech Lube while the oil in my car was getting changed and the news came on. Apparently,moms are in an uproar because.....wait for it.....
Santa is too fat!!

Jolly old St.Nick needs a gastric bypass or a personal trainer. Moms do not think he is a good role model for the kiddies. So what if he eats a million cookies on Christmas Eve? He washes them down with milk and that's a healthy beverage. He's not swigging down a few brewskies or having a frappe at every house,now is he?

He works his butt off all year long. He puts everyone ahead of himself and he brings joy to the world. That's not an easy task especially in this day and age. He's probably a stress eater.....ahhhhhh....I can totally relate.

So what's the solution to Santa's round body? Call Jenny Craig? Liposuction? Lap band? Richard Simmons? A Dr.Phil intervention? Oh that would be hilarious.

"Santa.....you can not change what you do not acknowledge......you are over weight. You are not really jolly now are you?" For those of you who know Dr.Phil's lingo,this is what he would say.

I for one do not think Santa's weight is an issue. We will be leaving cookies and milk again this year. Maybe he'll eat the reindeer's carrots and feed the cookies to the reindeer. Then next year they'll be too damn fat to fly and no one will get any damn presents!!! Merry Freakin' Christmas!!

You can't quit motherhood

I was talking to my cousin last night. Her brother is divorced and she is fairly close to his ex-wife although the ex has some issues. One of which is that she barely takes care of her kids. They're not babies but they're not old enough to be on their own.

My cousin was with her 12 year old niece recently. She is very close to this girl and she loves her as well as her two brothers. She is more of a mother to them than their own mother is.Her niece revealed that she thinks her mother is just tired of being a mother. That floored me. Tired of being a mother? Tired?.....of being a mother?

I'm a mother and I am definitely tired but not of being a mother! I love being a mother. It's the best job on the planet. If I didn't have Lillianna I would have a huge empty space in my heart. She is the joy of my life.

Her activities keep me hopping,that's for sure,and I have no idea how I'd handle two kids but I completely love the one I have. I'll be mothering this child until the day I die. My mom is 70 and she is still mothering me and Kara.

It makes me crazy when parents think there is something more important in life than taking good care of their children and loving them unconditionally.

I pour my heart and soul into raising Lillianna. I take this job very seriously. I changed my work schedule back in May so that I could spend more time with her. I hate working 5 days a week but the pay off is that I can drop her off at school every morning,pick her up at 2:30pm and have the weekends with her. That sure beats working nights and weekends and missing her life.

I wish women understood that you just can't quit motherhood. If you choose to take that job....it's for life.

Suppressed stress?

Say that 5 times fast.....I dare ya!

I've been stressed for quite a while but lately,things are kind of normal although still stressful.....if that makes any sense.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm not any more stressed than usual but my left eye has been twitching off and on since yesterday. That only happens when I am under stress. So I must be suppressing some stress.

I over carbed today.....I guess I am stressed after all. Stupid stress!

A growth spurt

Today was Lillianna's yearly check-up with her pediatrician,Dr.Fernandez. I knew Lilianna went through a huge growth spurt this past year and I was eager to hear what the doctor had to say. Usually she only gains a few pounds each year but this year she gained 10. Dr.Fernandez was thrilled with that. I was surprised when she told me she had grown 4 inches. I didn't realize she had gotten so much taller.

Dr.Fernandez said that normally she would've only grown 2 inches but since she grew 4,that means she's hit puberty. I told her we already knew that. The mood swings have already surfaced which can go on for the next few years.

Since I don't want to be at odds with my precious child just because hormones are taking over,I told Lillianna that when she is feeling out of control,she just needs to come to me and say,"I feel crazy." Then I can hug her or talk to her until she feels better. We tried this yesterday and it worked really well.

I have shared my lovely hormone stories with her and they make her laugh. I remember being 12 or 13 and having a melt down and my parents got angry at me. I vowed that I would remember how that felt and be kinder to my own child. Back then,I don't think parents really understood what was happening and all the emotions their child was going through.

When I was pregnant,holy hormones,I was on my way home and I drove by my house. Not wanting the stranger behind me to know that I passed my own house,I refused to turn around. I ended up driving 2 towns away before I could turn around and head home. At the time,it made perfect sense. Looking back,I just have to laugh and shake my head.

I have explained some of my PMS stories to Lillianna and again,they seem so funny now. I remember arguing with Rich way before Lillianna was born and honestly,I think I was mad about something to do with a spoon. Even as the ridiculous words were out of my mouth,I heard a voice in my head say,"Stop! You're not making any sense! You're out of control!" but I kept on freaking out anyway. I think the whole scene ended in tears and then the moment passed. Compared to my weird situations,Lillianna seems calm.

The other day she said,"I'm glad I have a Mom who remembers what it's like." I'm glad I kept my promise to myself to remember.

Do you have any crazy hormonal stories you'd like to share?

My family is soooooo lucky!

Yup...that's what a patient told me yesterday. She said I was sweet,funny and extremely intelligent and that my family is very lucky to have me! She said that I had to go home and tell my family that she said they were lucky. She made me laugh.

I have to start off by saying her name was Lillian. I always get chatty with nice patients named Lillian since it was my Nana's name and Rich's Nana's name which is why Lillianna has her name.
Lillian was 85 years old and very sweet. We chatted about a bunch of things after I did her eye exam. I don't get great patients very often so I really cherish the good ones. She really made my day.

Lillianna always tells me that I am the best mom so I knew she already realized how fortunate she is to have me! Rich,on the other hand....well.....I often wonder what he thinks of me. When I told him my conversation with Lillian he agreed that he was lucky to have me. Hmmmm......that kind of surprised me. You just never know what your family is thinking,do you??

An insult wrapped in a compliment?

Lillianna and I have quite an earring collection so we are constantly sharing our earrings with one another. One time I stood in the living room,arms akimbo (damn! I finally got to put that expression in something!I only hear it used in books.)and I said in that mom kind of way,"For the last time....put....your.....earrings....away."
She held them up in front of me and laughed,"Mom,these are your earrings!" Hmmmm.....who knew?

So the other day I borrowed one of Lillianna's Halloween earrings:a pair of fat,sparkly,happy ghosts. They are quite adorable. They look like the Pillsbury PopNFresh guy with glitter. I try to dress up my navy blue scrubs whenever I can.

I called in a patient who immediately noticed my earrings. She sat in the exam chair shrieking,"OOOOOH! I love your earrings. I gotta have 'em. Give them to me!! I just love them!!!"

I thought she was a little wound up for 67 but what the heck. I said,"Oh,thank you." Then she looked at my earrings again and said in the most disappointed voice she could manage,"Hmmm....they're Caspers....I thought they were cats! You can keep them!"

I was speechless. What could I have said to that?

Have you met Dash?

Lisa finally wrote about the birth of her second son,Dashiell. I can say from 1st hand experience that he is a little cutie pie. Then again,his older brother Trent is so cute I want to bite him. I got to feed and burp Dashiell a couple of weeks ago and since Lisa is really sleep deprived,I could've run off with the child. I only drive the speed limit so I could've never out run the police. That's why I didn't abduct him.

Lisa and I are going to plan a sleep over for me and Lillianna. She's going to take Trent and Lil out to a movie and I get to stay home with Dash! I told her I'd get up and feed him in the middle of the night. I love those feedings!

So hop on over to Lisa's blog and congratulate her on the birth of her precious new baby.

Munchausen by proxy syndrome

The first time that I heard about Munchausen by proxy syndrome I was shocked.I didn't understand how a parent could purposely hurt their own child. I was horrified and fascinated that the parents do it so that they can be the center of attention. Family members,doctors and nurses commend the parent for taking such good care of their sick child without knowing the parent is the one causing the sickness!

I've always hated when Lillianna has gotten sick. When she was about 5 years old,she threw up for the first time. I called the pediatrician several times during the day to update her on Lillianna's condition. By the next morning she looked horrible and I brought her in to be seen. The doctor took one look at her and had her admitted to the hospital for I.V. fluids. She ended up being in the hospital for 2 days.

I was with her constantly. When she had an accident getting to the bathroom on time,I cleaned and changed her and gave her reassuring hugs that Mommy would stay with her. If I could've been sick instead of her I would've changed places with her. My heart ached for my lifeless,droopy and sad child who cried because the nurse put the I.V. in her writing hand so she couldn't color.

Today,Dr.Phil talked about Munchausen by proxy syndrome. I only watched it for 5 minutes and then I had to leave to pick up Lillianna's friend Hannah who was coming over for a play-date. Lillianna watched it for 2 seconds and then said she didn't want to watch it at all. She was uncomfortable with the topic. I told her I'd watch it tonight when it repeats.

I hate the abuse that takes place with this syndrome but for some reason,it fascinates me and I will have to watch it.

I'm the mom!

Lillianan's best friend Mollie came over around 2pm today so that the girls could spend some extra time together before the sleep over starts at 5pm. After a few minutes Mollie and Lillianna asked if she could open her present right then. I said okay.

Mollie asked,"Are you sure it's okay?" I laughed and said,"Ya...I'm sure. I'm the mom and I make the rules. Go ahead and open it."

She gave her a friendship bracelet kit which Lillianna loved but I knew it was the second present that Mollie was so excited about. She had made a framed scrapbook page of their dance recitals for Lillianna. They have been dancing together since they were 3 years old.

I had made a similar gift for Mollie 2 years ago and I had wanted to make one for Lillianna but of course having it come from her very best friend gives it more meaning. Her mom and sister helped her put it together. It is just beautiful. I hung it up in Lillianna's room immediately.

I told her they could each hang their frames up when they room together in college. That would be so cool if they did!

Happy Birthday,Lillianna!

My daughter is 10 today. TEN!! She's been awake since 2am. How do I know this? I woke up to go to the bathroom and she was in bed reading and watching t.v.! I don't think she ever went back to sleep although she eventually stopped reading and turned off the room light.

Since I am a goofy mom,I put notes all over her lunch today.

On her peanut butter and fluff sandwich it says:

Hey,Peanut butter!
Ya,Fluff.
Did you hear that Lillianna turned 10 today?
Lillianna Piccini ?
Ya....that's the one.Hmmm...never heard of her!


On her bag of grapes it says:

A ten year old grape would be a really wrinkled raisin,
don't ya think?

On her bag of tortilla chips:

Ten year olds love tortilla chips.
Well,nine year olds do too
but that's not the point,is it?

On her bag of mini Oreos:
From all of us in the Oreo bag....
Happy 10th Birthday,Lillianna!

On her bottle of water:
Drink me!! Ten year olds need water to help them grow to be eleven year olds!

I also have a few surprises in store for her. I love sneaky surprises. Today is Wednesday which is rehearsal for the Winter Festival she was picked for. I will pick her best friend,Mollie up on my way home from work. She lives one town over from us. Then we will get Lillianna and Ashely from Winter Festival rehearsal. Lillianna will be shocked to find Mollie with me and I'm sure she'll ask why.

That's when I'll tell her we are going out for pizza before dancing school. The 3 of them are in the same class. After dance class,I will take the girls out for ice cream before taking them home. It's been hard to keep this a secret but it'll be worth it to see her little surprised face!!

Why October 2nd is an important date to us

Fourteen years ago today,Rich and I met.
October 2,1993 is the date Rich and I have inscribed in our wedding bands. We got married on November 5,1994 but we thought the day we met was more important than the wedding day.

Ten years ago today was my due date with Lillianna. When my midwife gave me my due date on my first check-up I nearly fell off the table. How could my due date be the very day that Rich and I met? I thought that was pretty amazing.
I went into labor right on schedule on October 2nd and delivered my precious baby on October 3 at 4:59am.

That means my bouncing baby will be TEN tomorrow!! She has asked me to wake her up at 4:56am so that she can savor her last minutes of being nine before she turns 10 at 4:59am. Ya gotta love her.

After work today I'll pick Lillianna up from school and then it's home to mass produce baked goods. We'll make funfetti cupcakes to bring to school tomorrow,a chocolate candy cookie cake and some cookies to bring to my mom's for Thursday and then we'll collapse.

I love her birthday!!!

What makes a family?

Every now and then Lillianna plays this game with me which I call "Real or Not Real." It consists of this type of conversation.

Lillianna: Auntie Kara.....is she really my aunt?
Me: Yes,she's my sister so she is really your aunt.
Lillianna: Auntie Belle.....real or not real?
Me: Belle is my best friend so she's your auntie because I love her.
(Belle is really Liane. I used to call her Lianabella in junior high and high school and over the years it got shortened to Belle.)
Lillianna:Auntie Ida?
Me:Auntie Ida is my aunt because she is married to my father's brother. She might be your grand aunt or something but she is your aunt.


I'm sure everyone has aunts and uncles that are not really related to them but it doesn't make them any less a part of the family. I think it makes them more a part of it because we choose to add them.

With that in mind,I had a great time at Kara's yesterday. I fell in love with Lisa's baby Dash. He is such a sweetie pie. I got to feed him which was so much fun and burp him,which was more difficult than I expected. He does not burp easily. I felt victorious when he finally gave me two big burps.

As we were gathering our things to leave in the evening,Lisa washed Dash's pacifier and then dropped it on the floor. I picked it up and washed and dried it and handed it back to Lisa. She looked tired at that point. She said,"Thank you Auntie Robin."

I said,"Ya....I decided I want to be Auntie even though we're not related."
Lisa asked,"Aren't we related because our families got married?" It was a good theory but I laughed and said,"No,honey. Technically,you are my sister's sister-in-law. We are not related."

We decided it didn't matter at all. Lillianna always calls her Auntie Lisa and I enjoy creating my own family with people I love.

Who have you added to your family?

Twenty year anniversary

Yesterday was the 20th anniversary of when my dad died. Twenty years! That is just so sad.Sometimes I can't even process how long he's been gone.
I wrote about this last year so I'll just link to it.

I watched our home-movies this morning with Rich and Lillianna. For Dad's 50th birthday Mom put all our reel-to-reel tapes onto a video and bought Dad a VCR. There is no sound of course and some of the tape is scratched but for the most part,it's awesome.

Much of it is of me when I was a baby up until I was about 3 years old. There is also Mom and Dad getting married,their one year wedding anniversary,Dad and his friends in Fort Dix for basic training in the Army Reserve and lots of family parties.

I love seeing my Nana and Papa when they were young and all our family. It's just fun and sad all at the same time. The amazing thing is that we just watched Lillianna's baby videos last night and then when we watched mine this morning,we all noticed similarities. I love that part.

Today Lillianna and I are going to Kara's house for Trent's birthday and to meet his new baby brother Dash.You may have read their mom's blog over here. Lisa is Kara's sister-in-law and Lisa has not blogged since Dash was born last month. Hmmmmm....I wonder why she can't find the time? I can't wait to see everyone. It'll be good to be together and have a fun day with all the kids. I am also looking forward to spending time with my furry nephew,Cody. I love that dog!!

Remember when flip-flops were called thongs?

I was a kid back in the 70s.When we said thongs we were talking about flip-flops,you know,those in between your big toe kind of rubbery beach sandals. Granted,thong underwear and thong bikinis have the same concept as flip-flops.....there is a big strip that fills a space. It may be a butt crack or the space between your toes but there is a divider involved and it's not often comfortable.

Not to harp on thongs but who thought it was a good idea to invent underwear that intentionally gave you a wedgie? That was one of our worst nightmares as a kid...getting a wedgie. Ahh the teasing that went on when one was trying to right this awful wrong..."Bobby's picking his wedgie....Bobby's picking his wedgie," the kids would mock in a sing-songy voice. Proper etiquette dictates that you NEVER pick your wedgie in public!

Remember when it was a humiliating experience if anyone ever saw any portion of your underwear? Now the girls wear their thongs higher than their skin tight hip-hugger pants and boys wear big baggy pants five times their normal size that they wrap with a belt but their billowing boxers have to be higher than the belt.It's all about seeing the underwear. If a boy saw a girl's underwear he would since,"I see London. I see France. I see Mary's underpants!" Oh the horror!

Let's look at the word,shall we?.....UNDER-----WEAR. If we were meant to see people's unmentionables then they would be called OVERwear or Peek-a-boos or something along those lines.

And while I'm at it,when did the phrase Baby Bump come into play? I am sick of reading a magazine and having someone's bare pregnant stomache glaring at me. The term baby bump irks me just as much as a man saying,"We're pregnant." I wouldn't want to be in the delivery room with that guy.I couldn't take the whining!

Following directions

I was just checking my email before packing up for work and I got an updated field trip notice from one of Lillianna's Girl Scout troop leaders. They're adding in a trip to the Cape Cod information center and then we go on the beach at low tide for exploration. That sounded great to both of us.

As I printed out the directions Lillianna laughed and said,"HA! Directions....that's funny........You're gonna have to carpool!"

Pretending to be stunned I said,"Well that's not very nice,Lillianna."

She looked over her shoulder on her way out the bedroom door and said patiently,"I'm just telling the truth."

Ya....she's right. I can never follow directions. Won't she be surprised when she finds out I actually know how to get there? I used to work on The Cape and it's not far from my office. HA back at her! (I might still carpool though....it's more fun to go with another mom!)

Marcia and Jan in love??

I just read about the newest Brady Bunch scandal. Maureen McCormick is confessing in a book that she and Eve Plumb had an affair. Here's my take on it.

#1) Why come out with this now?

#2) Who is going to feel better by this confession?

#3) I guess it makes sense why Eve Plumb had such bad memories of the show and had to be replaced at some point.

#4)Why can't you just let the public live with our "perfect family" illusion of the Brady Bunch? The more I hear,the more it sounds like the whole cast was involved in an orgy! Barry dated Maureen and Florence. Now Maureen and Eve?

I think they should update the words to the opening theme song...

Here's the story
of a horny family.......

From soul mates to cell mates

Rich and I were sitting on the couch watching t.v. this evening when I said,"You know,I have a great name for a post about the decline of marriage. It's called 'From soul mates to cell mates.' "
He just looked at me and burst out laughing. That made me laugh but the subject really isn't amusing.

I know the honeymoon is over faster than any married couple would like but Rich and I really thought we would have this loving,romantic and soul mate kind of marriage and that just didn't happen.....not at all.

We've been through a lot these past 14 years. We'll be celebrating our 13th anniversary in November. I think that's quite an accomplishment in this day and age but this isn't quite the marriage I had in mind.

I had always thought Rich and I could face any situation as long as we were a team. The reality is,we're usually not on the same team. Part of our opposite perspectives come from the whole Venus vs Mars thing. Men and women are just different. I often wonder why the whole world isn't gay.

Men understand men. Women understand women. How do these 2 groups ever get together?
It can't just be about sex. Marriage is so much more complicated than that. We've tried marriage counseling....twice. We're still married but I don't think either one of us would go so far as to say we are happy. We function. We get along fairly well. We both love Lillianna. We have a lot in common but I don't feel connected to this person. We both knew we were soul mates the minute we met. What the hell happened?

We've talked and talked about this over the years but nothing has ever changed. It makes me sad. It makes me feel lonely. No one should feel lonely in their marriage.
When he left for 6 months over 4 years ago,it was horrible. I cried every single day.When he came back,we said we'd never put Lillianna through that again. I don't want to be without him. I just want us to be better when we're together. I want to feel that connection again like when we first met.

How do you make that happen?

The Birthday Party Competition

For the past 5 years I have worked every weekend so Lillianna's birthday sleepover has always been from Friday night to Saturday morning. I would take Saturday morning off from my ophthalmology job which was 8am-12pm but I still worked my 2nd job from 1pm-7pm. Apparently,without knowing it,this saved a party conflict all these years. Lillianna's classmate Bridget must've been having her birthday party on Saturday which never interfered with Lillianna's party. (Their birthdays are one day apart.)

Since I quit my 2nd job back in May,this is the first time we can have the party from Saturday to Sunday. As "luck" would have it,the girls sent out their invitations on the same day and invited almost all the same people. When I heard this news I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was going to come down to a popularity contest and friendship loyalty. Who needs this crap at 10??

Lillianna and Bridget are friendly in school but they've never been friends. They don't invite one another to their birthday. They don't ask for playdates. They aren't involved in any common activities......but they do have many of the same friends.

Lillianna invited 15 people to her birthday. Four of them are people Bridget doesn't even know since they're not from school so we knew we weren't going to have a conflict there. I breathed a huge sigh of relief.

The first wave of sadness came when Lillianna announced,"Hannah isn't coming." Lillianna had just been to Hannah's party a few weeks ago so I couldn't imagine why she wasn't coming. Lillianna said,"Hannah told me that since I invited 15 and Bridget invited 12,she felt she should go to Bridget's party."

I'm an awful mother. My first thought was,"Well.....if that's the way she is going to play she doesn't need to be friends with MY child!" Luckily I didn't say that. I have no idea what I said really since I was so stunned that Hannah wasn't coming.

Two girls can't come at all. One is going camping with her family much to the horror of her mother who left the message on my answering machine. Sarah,one of Lillianna's closest friends is in a soccer tournament out of state. I promised Lillianna that she could have a special sleepover on another night with Sarah. She was one of the 3 girls with us at the dude ranch.

So now it's a waiting game. Neither girl wanted to change their party date since the invitations had already been sent. Lillianna and I know that some of her friends will probably go to Bridget's party and not come to hers and that hurts us both. She loves having her friends sleep over for her party.
I told her that it doesn't matter how many girls are here. We will have fun just like we always do.

I don't want Bridget to be sad and not have her friends at her party either. I want them both to have a happy birthday. They deserve that. They're 10 year old little girls!

Have you ever dealt with this situation? What did you do?

Six years later...are we any safer?

I'm sure everyone will be talking about where they were on September 11, 2001 tomorrow. I don't blame them. It was the worst thing to happen to this country since I've been alive.

My question is,do you think we're any safer since it happened? Security was high right after it happened but people get back in their comfort zone and they forget. People relax and get lazy and forget that the terrorism is far from over. I'm not saying we should all be paranoid and anxiety ridden every day but I don't think we should feel safe here. I don't believe we are safe.

I think airline security is a joke. Oh sure,they made Lillianna put her stuffed puppy through the scanner to check for weapons a few years ago but that didn't make me feel safe. Not at all.

If you've ever flown on El Al then you know what safety feels like. I wish Israeli security would come over here and train all the airport employees to be just like them. That would be wonderful! They're not afraid of racial profiling.

Osama is still running around somewhere. Why the hell can't we find him? Is anyone still looking for him? What are we actually doing in Iraq right now? Why is America involved in everything? A lot of countries hate us. We're not going to win them over. They are jealous of us and all the nice words in the world are not going to make them say,"Golly gee willikers....let's not kill the Americans. Let's sit down and have tea!"

I don't feel like we're safe and I am quite sure we will be attacked again....probably soon.

Do you feel like the terrorism is over here? Do you feel safe?

Taking a chance

Lillianna came home today with a notice to sign up for a Winter Dance Festival at the local college. Her elementary school is opening this up to 4th and 6th graders. If they sign up,there will be a drawing to see who is chosen to be in the show. There are no try-outs.

I looked at the list of practices and the dates of the shows. Some practices are on her regular dancing school day and Girl Scouts and they may need additional practice times. I thought about it and told Lillianna that I was sorry but she wouldn't be able to do it.That was over 3 hours ago.

She just asked me again and said this was the last year the festival was being opened to the elementary kids since next year Lillianna's school will close down and will be given back to the college. She will be sent to another school across town.

I told her I was willing to sign her up and take a chance. If her name is picked then I will make this work for her even if we have to juggle her other activities for a while. She jumped up and down screaming her thank-yous. I figure,if it's meant to be then it will be.

Seaglass jewelry

My friend Liane has her website up and running....finally! She has designed the most gorgeous seaglass jewelry. Please take a moment and check out her website.
Uniquelyseaglass

I own this amethyst pendant!
I always get a million compliments when I wear it.

When she hosted a jewelry show on her last visit to Massachusetts,I couldn't believe how clever and talented she was at designing jewelry. We've known each other since we were 12. I am so proud of her accomplishments.

If you know of anyone who may be interested in her website,please pass along this information.

Thank you!

Ya gotta love Judge Judy!

I just adore watching court room shows when people are pleading their case and in an attempt to look intelligent,they use a word incorrectly or just make one up.

I am now watching Judge Judy and there is a couple who asked a neighbor to watch their dog while they were away for 3 days. The dog was ill and wouldn't eat so the nice neighbor took the dog to the vet where he was diagnosed with a serious illness. When the couple came home,they refused to pay the vet bill.

The wife said,"I know this sounds bad but if our dog was so sick we would've euthalized it." Euthalized? I think she meant euthanized!

It just reminds me of Gilda Radner when she played Emily Litella on Saturday Night Live. She always misunderstood things and then had a fit about them. She ranted and raved about euthanasia because she thought it was about the Youth in Asia! She said something like,What is it about the young kids in Asia and why are they all killing themselves? That's all I could think about while listening to the testimony about being euthalized!

That stupid Yoplait commercial

There are many dumb commercials on t.v. but one of the more irritating ones is the Yoplait yogurt commercial where the short haired brunette is a bridesmaid at a wedding. First of all,this brunette is a terrible actress as well being incredibly annoying. She's the one that can't just say her yogurt is "good" because heaven forbid the audience doesn't understand just how good that yogurt really is.

She has to go above and beyond and compare her yogurt to other good things.It's like finding a parking space in the front row good. It's like staying home from work good. Ya,ya....I get it. We all get it! MMMMMMM......your yogurt is good!

Now this Yoplait wedding commercial has me asking a whole lot of questions. If you haven't seen it,the brunette and a friend of hers are sitting all alone at an outdoor wedding reception dressed in hideous fluffy bridesmaid dresses. They have their feet propped up on a chair as they eat their yogurt. Of course they have to say how good this really is.

"It's like not catching the bouquet good!" (What's the point of catching the bouquet? You are so one dimensional. Your whole life revolves around your stupid yogurt!)

Then there is a comment to the effect of "It's like burning this dress good." (Hey....bitter woman,suck it up. Anyone who has ever been in a wedding has dealt with the dress whether they liked it or not. It's a few hours out of your whole life. Can you just stop complaining?)

"It's like getting out of these shoes good!" (I wore flat shoes at my sister's wedding and then ya know what? I put on my big fat white New Balance sneakers so that I could dance without pain. No one even noticed! So shut up about your dippy little sling backs!)

I'm curious to know why these 2 woman are all alone at the table. All the other 15 or so tables are EMPTY! Why is everyone else having fun? Maybe,all the other guests ran as far from the yogurt eaters as they could because they were complete fun crushers and whiners. That sounds about right to me.

Finally......some good news!

The past few months have been so stressful. When Rich was laid off back in February he looked for a new job every day and finally found one in April. Unfortunately,the pay was less but the medical and dental benefits were great. I didn't realize how bad the pay cut was going to be.

We have had such horrible financial problems these past few months and the stress got to be overwhelming about 3 weeks ago. After having 2 anxiety attacks every day,I went to the doctor and got some meds to keep me calm. They've helped but the financial doom continued to hover over our life.

Yesterday,Rich found out he got the night job that he had applied for. This will be from 6pm-11pm Monday through Thursday and then he'll work 12pm-6pm on Saturdays. His day job is from 7:30am-4pm so he can go from one to the other. We are so excited. Now our life can finally turn around and we will be able to pay our bills on time and get out of debt!

I know the new checks won't happen for a few weeks but at least I know money is on the horizon and that will allow me to breathe without anxiety!

Inappropriate pool attire

Lillianna and I spent 4 hours at the pool yesterday. As usual,it was a very relaxing day. I had to crinkle my nose and roll my eyes a couple of times because people can be quite odd.

I totally understand if someone doesn't have a bathing suit and they have to improvise. Many people have gone into the pool in shorts or cut off jeans...whatever. I have no problem with that. I did have a problem with the man who was wearing thin,tight gray sweatpant shorts without underwear. When he got out of the pool,his shorts went up his butt and when he turned around,the shorts clung to his private parts. No one needed to see that.

I was thinking that his wife should've said something to him but then I noticed she was in a thong! She was in her 40's and had too much cellulite to be wearing a thong.Those two are a match made in bathing suit heaven!

The second offense was from a young guy in his early 20's who arrived with his girlfriend and another young geeky couple. I'm sure you're familiar with the milk campaign that photographs famous people with a milk mustache and the caption reads,"GOT MILK?" Well this guy's t-shirt had a stick figure on it of a personal nature and the caption read,"GOT VAGINA?"

As soon as Lillianna saw it she was horrified! She called me over to her so that she could report the horror. I knew she would see it. I told her that I had seen it and to just ignore it. On the way home she said she was hoping her friend Angela and her little sister didn't see it. She always so considerate of others. How could that guy think it was appropriate to wear that t-shirt to a public pool where there are little kids?

It's all about the lip gloss

This post is over at DotMoms.

Yup....uh huh.....ya!

Lillianna told me that at the end of the school year,when she visited with her 4th grade teacher,the kids were told they couldn't say yup,uh huh and ya next year. I thought that was a good policy. I don't want my precious daughter to sound like a doofus. (Eegads....do the kids say doofus anymore? Probably not.)

Today while I was at work I caught myself saying Yup and uh huh quite frequently. I was stunned and kind of embarrassed. I'm not some teeny-bopper snapping my gum and twisting my hair while I talk about a dreamy boy in school. I'm a 44 year old grown woman who should know better.

As of today,I'm going to give up these words that are prohibited in 4th grade. I want to live my life as a mature adult! Don't you? Yup...uh huh....ya...I bet you do too.

Lost

Have you ever taken a good look at your life and wondered how you got here? That's how I've been feeling lately. All my plans for my marriage,my home,my career and my life in general took a different path than the one I thought I'd be traveling down.

I know that life is not a simple thing that can be wrapped up and tucked in your pocket for safe keeping but I never imagined that no matter how much I wanted something to happen,it just wouldn't work out that way. Life just seems to have a mind of it's own. It's total disregard of my plans really pisses me off.

For the past few months,even though my change in jobs has made my life easier,things are still spiraling down a road that I never wanted to be on. Now the question is,how the hell do I turn around and get out of here?

Unfortunately,every time I turn around to go down a better road,something else happens and I feel like I'm heading towards hell. Good thing I'm Jewish since we don't actually believe in hell. That's a plus!

I suppose a good therapist and a prescription for an anti-depressant is my first step at this point. Many of the things that I want in my life aren't really up to me and that's the part that gets me down. Rich needs to get a 2nd job working at night so that we can pay the bills but so far,he hasn't found one. The financial stress is keeping me up at nights and it occupies most of my thoughts during the day. It's hard to tune it out.

A few weeks ago when I got to work I felt so weird. I went to the surgery center and had them check my blood pressure which turned out to be fine but my pulse was 98. They said that was way too high and tried to get me to relax. Even when I'm not thinking of stressful things my subconscious is thinking about them.

I'm just feeling so lost. I wonder if I'll ever be able to find the path I initially wanted to be on or if I'm doomed to a live a life that I didn't choose and that I don't actually enjoy the way I had hoped to.

I feel like a loser and I really hate that feeling. Every time I take a step to make my life better,it's not enough. I wonder when things will turn around.

I hate dishonest people!

About 13 years ago,before Rich and I were married,we were food shopping in our local supermarket. While Rich put the groceries in the trunk,I ran next door to CVS to pick up a prescription. When I returned to the car Rich was sitting there shaking his head. I asked him what was wrong.

"This little car pulled out of it's parking space and hit another parked car. The driver got out,looked around and then sped off," he explained.

I said,"Well that's pretty typical. People suck."

Still shaking his head he said,"But his license plate said The Rev"

I nodded and told him that was a local reverend in our town and his actions didn't surprise me. I never liked that guy. Looking back,I should've seen if there had been any damage and then left a note saying who hit the car but I didn't really think of that back then. After what happened to me last week,I wish I had left a note.

Thursday morning Rich left for work and then a few seconds later he came back inside. Worried I asked what was wrong. He said someone had hit the front passenger side of my car. When I went outside I saw the huge dent on the side near my tire and the front part of my fender was torn off and hanging. I felt sick.

We're so behind on all our bills and now I have to pay a $500 deductible for my car. I am at the end of my rope with all this stuff. How could anyone smash my car like this and just drive away? I don't know if it happened when I was at Stop&Shop the night before of if it happened when Rich took it to do his radio show. Either way,the car was unoccupied when it happened.

Dishonest people suck!!!

What I learned about my sister

Kara and Peter went on a 4 day vacation and they asked us to stay at their house and dog sit for Cody,their 15 month old chocolate lab. I call him my furry nephew because I just love him and consider him to be one of the family.

Today I am working in their office because whenever they go away,that's what I do. It doesn't matter that I only know about ophthalmology and they own a mortgage company. Somehow,I always manage to survive.

Staying in Kara's house is great. She has the kind of house I would love to have. Since she hasn't even been married a year yet,all her "stuff" is new. She has every household gadget you can think of. It's amazing.

When I work in her office and have to find a file,I just stop and think for a moment and then I can figure out where she keeps it. Kara was a disorganized child and teenager but as an adult,she is obsessed with order. Who knew that was going to happen? Her organized mind makes my job in the office a piece of cake.

Being in her kitchen has been fun because again,if I just stop and think,I can find whatever I am looking for after one try. Everything is right where you would expect it to be. I find that to be amazing as well as fascinating. In my apartment,since there is so little space,I just put things wherever they fit. It may take several tries to find what you are looking for and then you still might be out of luck.

After one night and one morning in her house I learned some interesting things that I hadn't known before.

1) Kara has an obsessive relationship with barbecue sauce. She has 3 bottles in the refrigerator and she also has about 10 more in the cabinet. I don't know if she thinks there will suddenly be a barbecue sauce shortage or not but I guess she's not taking any chances.

2) All the beds in her house are fluffy. They have heavy,heavy comforters and the beds are covered with huge fluffy pillows. Last night I felt like I was sleeping on a huge puffy cloud. If you ever need a pillow,come to my sister's house.

3) Speaking of heavy,Kara's plates and silverware weigh a ton. If I ever drop a spoon on my foot,I know it'll break a toe. I've never seen such heavy dinner ware in my life. I find it amusing since Kara is very thin. I don't know how she holds a plate without toppling over.

4) Kara's linen closet looks like Bed,Bath and Beyond. It is stuffed to the brim with towels of every size and sheets and pillow cases for all the fluffy beds!
My towels are all about 13 years old. I think someone should throw me another bridal shower!! I need some new towels,damn it!

Over the next couple of days I am sure I will discover other interesting things about Kara. I am always intrigued by this girl!

How hot are you?

Lillianna and I were driving home the other day when I noticed a car coming towards us on the other side of the road. The passenger window had two feet hanging out of it. There is a seat belt law in Massachusetts and there was no way anyone could sit in that position and still be wearing a seat belt unless they were a contortionist.Since we aren't really circus folk in this neck of the woods,I doubted that this person was blessed with such a talent.

The seat belt issue wasn't even my real concern. I couldn't help but wonder,how freakin' hot do your feet have to be that you are compelled to remove your foot wear and stick your feet out the window to cool them down? Maybe when your feet are hot your brain cells die off in chunks so you don't realize how stupid it is to stick your feet out that window. Could that be it? Even if my feet were literally on fire,I would simply pull the car over and smother the flames. I wouldn't stick them out the window! Plus,I'm an air conditioner girl and that's much cooler than the hot sticky breeze outside.

Many years ago when Rich and I were driving on the highway,we saw a crazy accident. I don't know what made the first car stop but about 6 or 7 cars rear ended each other because of that one car. When a car with feet hanging out the passenger window rear ended the car in front of it,the feet disappeared. I always wondered what happened to the body attached to those stupid feet. I'm sure I'll never know.

Do you stick your feet out the window when you are in the passenger seat?

Hero or complete and utter moron? You decide.

This evening,on the news,there was a story of a mom who they were saying was a hero because she gave CPR to her 2 year old child who almost drowned. Oh how they praised her for her quick thinking.Her heroism saved his life. I decided to reserve my judgment until I heard how the child almost drowned. I had a feeling I knew what the cause of this nearly fatal accident was.

Eventually they got to the part of what happened. It seems that the mom was outside in her backyard with her 2 year old in his wading pool. She went inside "just for a minute" when the child went under the water. I was stunned when I heard this news. Gee whiz and golly willikers.....who would've guessed that's how the accident happened? Another child whose parent left them alone for "just a minute". What could possibly happen????

When the mom came outside she saw her drowning child and pulled him out of the pool. I guess she called 911 and she administered CPR until they came. The boy is in the hospital but he will be okay.

As the three of us sat on the couch watching this I was yelling all kinds of nasty comments at the tv. This just makes me crazy! No parent is perfect but if you mix a small unattended child with a pool of water you're bound to get a drowning. Who doesn't know that? In my tirade I got really nasty and found my husband and daughter staring at me in shock. I stared back. "Uhm...dropping the F-Bomb,are we?" Rich asked in surprised. I sighed and said,"I just want to punch that mother in the face. How stupid can she be?" Neither one of them disagreed with me. Then I blurted out,"Who thought it was a good idea to watch the news anyway?" I grabbed the remote and put on That 70's Show.I hate the show but I hate the news even more.

So what do you think? Is this mom a hero or a moron?

The new pool rules....RULE!

We have lived in this apartment complex for over 4 years. The rules have been pretty strict these past few years and I haven't been very happy. Last year the complex hired an outside foreign life guard service and the rules got even worse.

All inflatable pool toys and diving sticks were still banned but then they added that if we brought a guest under the age of 14,their parent had to be with them. Lillianna's an only child. We need friends to play with in the pool. We couldn't have any children over last year at all and it was tough.

This year,several Egyptian families moved into our complex and they bring anyone they want in the pool. They also bring boogie boards,inflatable tubes,small hard footballs and other throwing toys.I don't know if they didn't read the rules that were delivered to each tenant or they just don't understand or care but they have broken just about every pool rule. The lifeguard has never said a word.

Yesterday,which was our 2nd time at the pool this year,I noticed the huge amount of toys and other banned items. Lillianna's classmate nearly bonked her off the head with the football in an attempt to throw it to his sister. So much for safety. The lifeguard said nothing. On the next break that the lifeguard took,I went to the rental office. (The lifeguard takes a 15 minute break every 45 mins and we have to get out of the pool. This ridiculous rule started last year!)

So,Lillianna and I went to the office. I just wanted to know if all the rules that they sent us several times before the pool opened,still applied. The 2 woman in the office said that it is up to the lifeguard to enforce the rules. If he doesn't,then he doesn't. They are an outside company. She said she could talk to her manager and have them enforce them. I said,"I just want to know because I'll bring diving sticks and a friend for my daughter if the rules don't apply." She said she wouldn't say anything to the manager and I should go ahead and do what I wanted.

So....hooray for idiot lifeguards!! Lillianna and I are heading to the pool in an hour with her diving sticks!! Maybe tomorrow we'll have a friend over!!

Child neglect

Every story has two sides but when it has to do with child neglect or abuse,I really only see one side:the child's side.
Oh sure,Lillianna acts like I am the most abusive mother when I ask her to please clean up her room. "But Mom....I thought summer vacation was supposed to be fun. How is cleaning my room fun?"

On the rare occasion when I sleep late and Lillianna helps herself to her own breakfast,I feel bad.When I wake up at 8:30am,(since i usually wake up at 5am,8:30am is late for me) I look around at the empty Twinkee wrapper,the remains of Cocoa Puffs in a bowl,3 lollipop wrappers,a popsicle wrapper and a sticky cup of
fruit punch and I think,"Damn! I hope DSS (the department of social services) doesn't get word of this! They'll take my child away."

Luckily,Lillianna will say,"I took my vitamins." Hooray....we're saved.She ate something healthy.My child can stay with me.
The reality is,I can't imagine neglecting or abusing my daughter.

A co-worker of mine has 3 children who are 12,10 and 3.Rumor has it that the 12 and 10 year old have gone to live with their father since they are left home alone every day while their mother works. The 12 year old is in charge of the 3 year old and she resented it so much that she chose not to live there anymore. The 3 year old has a different father than the other two and she may be going to live elsewhere as well.
The mother,from what I have heard,couldn't care less.

This is all told to me second hand by a relative of this mother so I'm not 100% sure of it's accuracy but the story disturbs me.

When Rich told me he was leaving me 4 1/2 years ago,my worst moment was when he had to tell Lillianna. I kept hoping she wouldn't turn around and say,"I want to live with Daddy." I think I would've been institutionalized at that point. Lillianna was only 5 years old but she wanted to live with me and never questioned that that was how it would be.

I'm hoping that if she chooses to go out of state for college in 9 years,I'll be loving and supportive and just let her go without buying a condo near her school so that I can go with her!

I would never be relieved or happy to have my child decide to live elsewhere in her young years. I enjoy raising her and loving her. If anyone ever tried to take Lillianna away from me,they'd have to pry her out of my cold,dead hands!

Steven Birnam please send me your email address

If you are the one who sent me the comment below,please send me a way to get in touch with you. I would love to hear about Eyal and how some of my old friends are doing.I've tried over the years to email the kibbutz but no one ever answers me.

Yes,"E" is exactly who you think he is. I hope to hear from you!



BTW: Was the "E" in question Yishai? - who had been evacuated from Europe, sent to Kfar Giladi and finally found himself on Eyal.
I just got back from a trip to Israel I had been a volunteer on Eyal during the Yom Kippur War, and dropped by the kibbutz to visit friends - unfortunately Yishai was in his room - he has been sick, and not up to getting out.
Steven Birnam | 06.28.07 - 4:08 pm | #

If you need an excuse to get out of work.....

Some of my co-workers come up with really odd reasons why they can't come in to work or why they have to leave early. I thought I had heard them all....until today.

One woman,I'll call her Miranda since we don't work with anyone who has that name,complained of a stomach ache first thing this morning. I had pre-menstrual cramps that could kill a person but I popped 6oo mg of ibuprofen and I felt fine. I'd never go home "sick" with period cramps. Damn....the majority of the company is made up of women. If we all called in with that excuse no one would ever be at work!

So,Miranda had this stomach ache and then about an hour later her name was crossed off the schedule and someone said she went home. One of Miranda's family members also works with us and she confessed the real reason that Miranda went home.
She had to poop and she didn't want to do it at work.

Someone asked if she was coming back after she pooped. Her family member told us no. One of my co-workers shook her head and said,"That must be some dump she's taking!" We all fell over in a fit of laughter. In fact,we joked about it all day. Everyone agreed that pooping at work wasn't our first choice but we've all done it and then used the air freshener to make it nice and flowery for the next person. We're all human and we all poop! We can't go home every time we have to poop.

One woman said,"I feel a little flatulence coming on....I think I'd better go home!"
Thank goodness we all have a sense of humor or we could've been really bitter. Maybe I'll use that for tomorrow.I'll call my coordinator and say, "Ya...hi...I'm wicked bitter about yesterday and I can't come to work today!" Nah....I'd never do it. I'm too responsible.

Have you ever left work to go home to poop? What is the worst excuse you ever used to get out of work?

Mom's life lessons

This post is over at DotMoms.

Crunch time

There are only 6 more days until my mother's 70th birthday and there is still so much to do. Kara and I went shopping yesterday to buy what we need to make center pieces for the tables. That is to say that Kara is actually making them. I'm in charge of making chocolates,of course,which I'll make on Friday.

Today I started Mom's scrap book and I love how it's coming out. I have some really cool pictures from the 60's and 70's. I tried to make personal pages so that the people who are closest to her will have a page to sign. My page has a picture of me and Mom from 1964. I was 20 months old. The other picture is from my wedding in 1994. I left a space to write a nice letter to Mom which I'll do on Saturday.
Kara's page is really cute too. Our pages are side by side so we also have 2 pictures of the 3 of us on each page. I'm really excited about this.

Well,that's it for my break. I have to get back to scrapbooking! Time's a tickin'!

Stay tuned for seaglass!

My best friend,Liane,came up from Virginia to visit with her family. Last night,she had a party to show her new line of seaglass jewelry. It was beautiful as I knew it would be. Liane designs all the pieces herself. Her website should be up in about 2 weeks and then I will link it here.

I am so proud of her. I thought the party was amazing. For someone who has been quite shy all of her life,she was phenomenal giving a talk on some of the pieces and giving a history of seaglass. I tried so hard not to cry. I was just so proud of her. I only shed a tear when I talked to her at the end of the party and told her how great she did. We've been best friends for 32 years. She's lucky I didn't sob through the whole speech!

I'll keep you posted when her website goes up!

A great new word

Every now and then Lillianna and I come up with a new word or expression that really works for us. Years ago I was trying to get Rich and Lillianna to hurry up so that we could leave the house. I meant to say,"Shake a leg" but somehow it came out as,"Shake your sheep!" Rich and Lillianna looked at each other then looked at me and burst out laughing. We still use that expression whenever we are in a hurry.

The other day Lillianna was telling me about a girl she has known for years through her best friend. Apparently at a recent party,this girl really gave everyone a hard time. Lillianna sighed and said,"She's not very get-alongable." I just loved that word. It seems to fit quite a few people that we know. Now we use it all the time.

Have you ever made up words that you still use?

Do I miss my old job?

I had to call my old job yesterday and I was asked if I missed that job. I said,"Nope. I don't miss it one single bit but I do miss a lot of the people."

I worked with a great group of people. Over the 4 1/2 years that I worked there it was like we were all married to one another. We shared good times and bad. We were there in sickness and in health. We shared the bad news of when our husbands lost their job and the joy when they found a new one. We shared the ups and downs of motherhood. We laughed and we cried.

So I just wanted to say "I miss you!" to Samantha,Justine,Lisa,Suzie,2 Sues,Frannie,Colleen,Jen and everyone else I am too tired to mention by name. I may only be working one job now but by 7:30pm, I'm exhausted!! My mind is a blank right now.....sorry.

I hope you are all doing well and that it's not too busy for you since I heard someone else left recently. Hang in there!!

The power of prayer

Jill survived her surgery and from what I hear she is doing well. With only a 20% chance of survival,her recovery is truly a miracle. Kara told Lillianna that Jill brought a bottle of holy water with her and before she got the anesthesia,she asked the surgeon and a nurse to put some on their hands. They must have done that before they scrubbed up!

I'm going to ask Kara for her address so that I can send her a card. I've never met Jill but I'm sure glad she is doing well and can live another day to be a mom to her daughters.

Thanks to everyone who prayed for her.

Prayers are desperately needed!

My sister Kara just called to give me some very sad news. Her husband's friend's daughter in law was diagnosed with a tumor around her kidney and one around her heart. She had recently given birth to her second daughter and I guess she wasn't feeling well. That's when the tumors were found. She was told she needed immediate surgery.

Her name is Jill and she is going in for a 10 hour surgery tomorrow at 12pm. Jill was told she only has a 20% chance of surviving the surgery but she is very optimistic and she is sure she will come through with flying colors. Let's make that a reality.

Please say a prayer for this young mother.
Thank you!

One step closer to Iraq

I just read on Lisa's blog that TC left for Oklahoma and Arizona. I knew it was happening but it still sucks.

(For those of you who don't know,TC is my sister's brother-in-law. He was also best man at her wedding so we walked down the aisle together. I think he is a very complex guy and I find him to be so interesting. He is also extremely funny in a low key way. I kind of forced his wife Lisa to start her own blog a while back because I thought it would be helpful keeping TC in the loop while he is away. Not that he will be driving a tank and typing on a laptop but......he can check in every now and then.
Lisa turned out to be a very amusing story teller so I am glad I twisted her arm a little bit. Her blog also keeps me in the loop because we don't see each other very often and I miss out on lots of things. Trent is a very funny child so I love hearing about what he is doing.)

Anyway,if you get a chance,please read Lisa's post. Being a military wife is difficult and she could use some support right about now since her second son is due in a few months and TC will not be home for this joyous event.

Busy weekend

I only have to work until 12pm tomorrow and for that I say YAHOOOOOOO!!!!
I do miss my co-workers at the hospital but I don't miss working all weekend,every weekend at all. Nope....not at all.

So,after work tomorrow I'll come home and relax for a while. Then we are heading to my sister's to watch a UFC pay per view at her house. I am always at work when Rich and Lillianna go over there but this time,I can actually go and hang with the family.This is the part I have missed most of all.

Sunday morning I can sleep past 4:30am again. It's lovely to not have to get up so early and spend the day at work. At 5:30pm we are meeting our friends,Kristy and Jerry and going out for pizza. We have been friends for 17 years but next week they are moving to Georgia. It will be weird without them. Thank goodness for unlimited long distance and the internet.

Monday I am planning to go to the pool if it's pool weather. It's just nice to have most of the weekend off now. I love doing family things.

Have a great long weekend everyone!

A blessing in disguise

This post is over at Dotmoms!

Food cravings

I know that people who suddenly crave red meat are told they must be low in iron but what does it mean to crave pumpernickel?

I grew up in a bakery and I loved all breads. My least favorites were cissel bread which has caraway seeds in it and pumpernickel bread. In the past few weeks,I've been eating Snyders's pumpernickel and onion pretzels. I'm obsessed with them and I don't know why.

Yesterday,I had to pick up a couple of things at the supermarket and I couldn't get pumpernickel bread off of my mind. I thought this was kind of odd but I just couldn't shake the need to eat some pumpernickel bread so I bought a loaf. The next step?.....the cream cheese aisle. I finally decided on a light Philadelphia cream cheese which I thought would compliment the bread perfectly.

As soon as I got home I toasted two pieces and spread them with cream cheese. It was delicious,just like I knew it would be. I can't wait to make the same thing for breakfast this morning.

Putting pregnancy cravings aside,do you ever have weird cravings for things that you never liked before? Do you ever wonder why? I sure do.

(I just googled pumpernickel and here is what I found. I thought this was hysterical and may be the reason I feel gassy this morning!)

Etymology of pumpernickel

The Philologist Johann Christoph Adelung states about the Germanic origin of the word, in the vernacular, Pumpen was a New High German synonym for being flatulent, a word similar in meaning to the English "fart", and "Nickel" was a form of the name Nicholas, an appellation commonly associated with a goblin or devil (e.g., "Old Nick", a familiar name for Satan). Hence, pumpernickel is described as the "devil's fart", a definition accepted by the Stopes International Language Database [1], the publisher Random House [2], and by some English language dictionaries, including Webster's Dictionary [3]. The American Heritage Dictionary adds "so named from being hard to digest."

Remember when we were young?

Last night,Lillianna had a concert at school. As a surprise,I called my friend Amy on my way to work yesterday and asked her what her daughter Mollie was doing that night. Since she had no plans,I asked if she would like to come to Lillianna's concert. Without asking her daughter,she said she'd love it.

Lillianna and Mollie have been best friends since they were 3 years old and met in nursery school. Even though we live one town away from each other,the girls have remained the very best of friends. They have been in the same dance class for 6 years and have shared many fun times together.

I told Lillianna that we had to leave early for the concert because Amy had called me and asked if I could return Mollie's sweatshirt that she had left here last week when she slept over. So,Lil thought that's why we were going to Mollie's. Well,we did return the sweatshirt and as Lillianna explained that she had to go because she was in a concert,Mollie said,"Ya,I know....I'm coming with you!"

They hugged each other,jumped up and down and screamed. Lillianna gave me her look that means,"Why didn't you tell me?" I just smiled innocently and said,"I told you. You're on a need to know basis!" I love surprising her.

On the ride to school,Lillianna told Mollie that she had found her photo album of when they were 3 years old and they were making chocolates at our house. I said,"You guys were so cutie-pie little then." Then I thought a minute and said,"In a few years you'll look back at this year and say,'Remember when we were 9? That was so long ago!'" The girls just laughed.

Then I was on a roll."And when you're 60 you can say,'Wow....remember when we were only 40? We looked good back then. We were so cute,weren't we?'"
While the girls were laughing I added,"I'm sure you'll still be having sleepover birthday parties with each other when you're 90!"

Then one of them said,"Then we can bring a casserole." Both girls were hysterical by then. I asked them what they meant by that. You never know if casserole is slang for something nowadays,you know? That just got them laughing even more.

Finally Lillianna said,"You know.....a casserole.........That's what old people bring each other,Mom......casseroles!"

Then I started to laugh. Kids have a funny way of looking at things. I guess if I start bringing casseroles every where I go then I'm old,right? I hope my string bean casserole doesn't count because I've been bringing that every where I go for years!

Time for a change

This post is over at The Lighter Side.

An unexpected visitor

I was singing to the radio and sipping my coffee on the 35 minute drive to work this morning when my car suddenly filled up with the scent of Old Spice. I looked around to see what could possibly cause that smell. I didn't see anything but it smelled like someone dropped a bottle of this after shave in the back seat of the car.

After Dad died almost 20 years ago,I took his Old Spice bottle and saved it until about 2 months ago when I did a huge cleaning and decided most of the after shave had evaporated. Reluctantly I threw it away. His memory isn't in an old dusty bottle and I think I finally realized that.

As I inhaled that familiar smell,my eyes got teary and I said,"Hi Daddy......I miss you." The smell of Old Spice lasted for about a minute and then it suddenly disappeared. Daddy's birthday is in 3 days. I guess he just wanted to pay me a little visit. I love when that happens.

Another happy day

Saturday was my last day working at the hospital. I will definitely miss a lot of people but overall,I was thrilled to be out of there. Sunday was the first time I could sleep past 4:30am on the weekend. It was lovely!

Mother's Day ended up being the best day of all. We went to my sister's house for a delicious gourmet breakfast.Peter made frittatas,waffles,sausages and a whole lot of scrumptious food. I had made home fries and bacon at home and brought it there. I'm not a sausage eater but they had this delicious chicken and apple sausage that had a little kick to it. I highly recommend it! We had so much fun being together and enjoying the yummiest meal ever.

I loved passing by the restaurants on the drive to Kara's house and seeing all the lines outside waiting to get in. There was no line at Kara's house which is good 'cuz I HATE waiting.

We left there around 1:30pm and drove home. I got Lillianna ready for her dance recital and we left home at 3:30pm. Her recital started at 4:30pm and she was a bright and shining star as usual. I had my tissues handy because I have yet to get through a recital without ending up in a pool of tears. I'm known for being a tad emotional. She was just amazing,if I do say so myself.

The recital ended at 7:00pm and we had made plans to go out for dinner with Lillianna's best friend,Mollie,and her family. Lillianna and Mollie have danced together for the past 6 years and her mom,Amy and I are good friends. Rich actually graduated high school with Mollie's dad. It's really a small world.

We went to a fun restaurant where I had only been for breakfast but their dinners and sandwiches were great. The girls sat at their own table next to us. They were thrilled. Mollie has an 11 year old sister and the three girls get along great together. We laughed and talked until 9:00pm and then we headed home. It was the perfect end to a wonderful day.

In fact,this whole week has been great so far. I've been working every morning at my ophthalmic tech job. So far I have had co-workers thank me for staying late for them so that they could go to lunch and one new tech told me she loved me today because I helped her figure something out. She's really funny because she actually used to work at Lillianna's dancing school so I knew her from there. When I saw her at work I was all confused. She's still learning the job and she was grateful for my help.

The doctors are thrilled that I added in more hours at this job and it's a great feeling to be appreciated. I guess I forgot how much I liked the doctors and co-workers at this job. I'm glad I'm back.

What's for dinner?

Whenever I asked that question as a child,my mother always had an answer. I rarely have an answer. How the heck am I supposed to know what's for dinner every night? I hate to cook and I hate to plan a menu a week ahead. I don't like being in charge of feeding my family 7 days a week.

When I asked Rich what he wanted tonight he said,"Something simple." His idea of a good meal and Lillianna's idea of a good meal are not the same. I have a completely different concept of delicious too. I think if we all ate the same food this job wouldn't be so darn difficult but I will basically prepare 3 different meals tonight.

Now do you see why I never have an answer to that question?

Stupid! Stupid!! Stupid!!!

I hate when I do something stupid!

I've been dealing with my diabetes since November 2005 and I feel like I have a pretty good handle on it. I bring my test kit and snacks wherever I go just in case I have problems with my blood sugar. I think I've done really well so far.

So why does my brain take a vacation every now and then and I act like my blood sugar isn't an issue? It's always an issue. It doesn't control my life but I have to be aware of it all of the time.

Today,I had a 10am hair appointment. While I was under the dryer,my blood sugar suddenly dropped and I felt dizzy. I didn't have my test kit or any snacks with me because I ate breakfast before I left. So Stupid!!

I didn't want to bother Karen,my hairdresser,because she was doing someone else's hair while I was under the dryer. I got up and grabbed a Dum-Dum lollipop (how appropriate for me!) and ate it as fast as I could hoping the sugar would help.

When my blood sugar drops,I'm just very quiet and focused on feeling better. I sucked so hard on this lollipop,I could've been recruited for a porn movie! I finally bit into it and swallowed all the pieces. Then I grabbed another pop and sat back in my chair.

One of the hairdressers went by and said I looked really tired. Karen looked at me and said,"You have no color left in your face. What's wrong?" I told her my blood sugar was low. She asked me what I needed and did I want her to run next door to the sub shop and get me anything. I said that I'd be okay and I'd go get a soda at CVS which is across the parking lot as soon as my hair was done.

I just wanted to smack myself in the head. Why didn't I pack my peanut butter crackers or a granola bar? I know better than to leave the house without snacks.
When this happened last year at the American Girl store in NY,I vowed this would never happen again. Here I am....moron of the month!

In the end,I managed to survive until I got to CVS and bought a bottle of Coke. I opened it and drank some before I even made it to the register. As soon as I got home I had chicken and veggies.

I feel so much better now but I'm kind of mad at myself. I know I can never be without back up snacks. I will take a lunch box with me all the time when Lillianna and I go to the dude ranch in June. I do not want this to happen again!

The countdown is on!

Sunday was my last Sunday at work and tonight is my last Tuesday! After this,I just have to work my last Saturday and then.......I'm done! I've worked 4 1/2 years at this job and I'm not sad to see it end.

Like any job,there have been good days and bad....people that I enjoy working with and others that are more challenging. Through it all,I think it's been a decent job and it fit my needs at the time. Now,things are changing and I had to make the decision to leave.

I started this job when Lillianna was 5 years old and in kindergarten 3 hours a day.
It was impossible to work while she was in school. By the time I arrived at my job,it was time to turn around and go back to pick her up from school. That's when I took a job where I could work nights and weekends so she could be home with Rich while I was at work.

A few years ago I went from per-diem to part-time so that I could pick up dental insurance. That was a great bonus for us since Rich's job didn't offer that. As I said,this job was a good fit for me at the time but a 5 year old child is very different from a 9 1/2 year old child and Lillianna's needs have changed.

She has so many weekend activities that I have been missing because I work every weekend. Rich doesn't enjoy these things the way that I do but he's the one who has to be there with her because I'm not home. I missed birthday parties where the moms hang out and chat while the kids roller skate. I missed selling Girl Scout cookies at cookie booths with her. Rich went but I don't think he loved it.

I don't have Lillianna's friends sleep over on the weekends because I'm not here although Mollie,her very best friend,has slept over a time or two on the weekends but her mom and I are good friends.She knows Rich. Most moms are uncomfortable with just dad being home and I can't blame them. I would be too.

So,I'm very excited about our new life which will begin next week. I am picking up more hours at my ophthalmic tech job but I'll be home every day by 2:30pm to get Lillianna from school. On the Saturdays that I decide to work,I'll be home by 12:30pm. We will still have the whole weekend as a family and I won't be working every Saturday. This will be the first time in many,many years that I won't be working on the weekends. I can't wait.

We are all looking forward to a more connected life together. This tag-team parenting is not fun or healthy for us anymore. We need to spend time together as a family and just enjoy one another. Feeling so disconnected has taken it's toll on us and we need to begin a more harmonious life.

So,just tonight and Saturday and then I'm done. Yahoo!

Date night

Lillianna had her dress rehearsal on Saturday from 2:30pm-5:00pm so I had to take off both jobs in order to make this all happen. I didn't want to work in the morning and then come home at 1:00pm. I wouldn't have had enough time to curl her hair and get her ready. Formal portraits were being done that day instead of the week before at the dance studio so she had to be picture perfect.

After the dress rehearsal,we drove Lillianna to Plymouth for a birthday sleepover which had actually started at 1:00pm. We got her there by 6:30pm and the party was still in full swing. She gave us a hug and ran off with the rest of the girls. We asked Suzie and George for a suggestion on where we should go for dinner then we headed to downtown Plymouth.

We parked the car and then walked around looking at different restaurant menus and deciding where we wanted to go. We decided on Mama Mia's which we used to go to a lot when Rich worked at his old job because there was one right around the corner.

We were seated immediately which was a relief since we were both starving. Rich and I don't date much but when we do,it's such a nice treat. Our last night out,just the two of us,was in November. We don't have any couple time because of our work schedule....okay,my work schedule! This will all be changing next week after I work my last day at my night and weekend job. I can't wait.

After dinner,we walked around near The Mayflower ship and Plymouth Rock. It's right before tourist season so it wasn't very crowded,thank goodness. I hate crowds.

On the drive home,we stopped for ice cream at a yummy place that Rich knew about and I got my favorite soft serve low fat coffee ice cream. It was delicious and it was the perfect end to a fun night with my husband.

I fell asleep on the drive home and went straight to bed since I had to be up at 4:00am to go to work on Sunday. I think we are going to have to make lots more time for date night. We both deserve it!

How often do you get a date night with your spouse?

Things you just don't wanna hear your kid say

This afternoon I had Lillianna slice up some strawberries to put over pound cake for dessert after dinner. I let her use a butter knife instead of a plastic knife this time because I thought she deserved to handle a real utensil. Hey,she's nine,I figured it's time.

I was cleaning up in the kitchen while she was on strawberry duty in the dining room and I knew she could see me. I started doing a goofy dance which made Lillianna laugh. I continued dancing even goofier which made her laugh even more but then she told me to stop.

"Mom,don't make me laugh....I've got a knife in my hand!"

Just put it away!

I'll admit to being lazy at home and not wanting to clean on a daily basis. I grew up in a home that was immaculate. It was comfortable and always clean. It wasn't a "don't sit down on that!" kind of home. There was no plastic covering the furniture. It was lived in but spotless. Mom has always been great at keeping a home beautiful. I totally suck at this!

A couple of weeks ago I decided to gain control of the chaos. I hate walking through the front door into the living room and seeing Rich's jacket on the chair, Lillianna's jacket on the floor, Rich's toy soldiers on the coffee table next to Lillianna's dry erase markers and board. The dining room table is covered with lunch boxes and the day's mail. It makes me want to throw my lunch box on the table and drop my sweater wherever the hell I feel like it. Generally speaking,that's exactly what I do. If you can't beat 'em.....well you can beat 'em but I think it's abuse....join 'em,right?

So,about 2 weeks ago I did a fairly thorough cleaning. I found the top of my bureau which was a surprise since it had been covered with stuff:papers,pictures,disposable cameras,spare change.....crap in general! It was nice to see it again. I cleaned the living room,dining room and kitchen and bathroom and I was pleased with the results.

Somehow,and I'm not pointing the finger at anyone in particular,the apartment got chaotic again. I had been picking up on a daily basis and it was going well. Everything was clean every day. It was a joy to come home to.

The problem is,this is a family project. I am not the maid and I do not want to be the only one straightening up every day. When Rich and Lil are too tired to clean up,it makes me tired too. So,tonight at dinner I will let them know that they have to get back on track again. I need to feel happy when I come home. I don't want to walk in the door,freak out at the mess and then turn around and bolt for the car to make a fast getaway!

How do you get your family to pick up after themselves??

Scrub-a-dubba-doo

Since I have been picking up more hours at the ophthalmology office,I decided to give in to wearing navy blue scrubs to work. This has been the dress code for the technicians for many years but since I was only there 8 hours a week,I didn't feel like investing in the outfit. We are also allowed to wear regular clothes if we want to which is what I've always done.

Saturday,I bought some scrubs and I wore them for the first time ever,yesterday. It's like going to work in my jammies!!! The down side is that I do look like a prison inmate in this boxy get-up but I'll give up style for comfort any day!

There is something to be said for wearing a uniform to work. I hate thinking of what to wear especially when I am working so much. I just don't have that many outfits right now so the scrubs make my life easier. I think I'm going to like this!

Have you ever had to wear a uniform to work? How did you feel about it?

There must be a better way,Alec

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm not a celebrity watcher by any stretch of the imagination but when I heard Alec Baldwin's phone call to his daughter on the news today,I was stunned.I had to find out more about what happened.
You can read about it here.

I understand that he and Kim Basinger had a bad divorce but this is no way to talk to your child. How do you call your 11 year old daughter a pig?

I have referred to Lillianna's room as a pig-pen but I would never,under any circumstances,refer to my daughter as a pig! That is just appalling.

I do call my child names but they are cutie pie names like Pumpkin Wumpkin,Noodle,
Lilly-pie....things like that. What kind of person calls his/her child a pig?

You CAN teach an old dog a new trick!

This morning,Rich was in the bathroom and I knocked on the door and said,"I need to go in before you take a shower,ok?" He said,"Ok." He came out a few minutes later and I ran in. When we buy a house,I want three bathrooms!!

The first thing I saw was a new roll of toilet paper sitting on the sink. Then I noticed there were only 4 sheets left on the old roll. My heart went pitter patter and I fell in love with him all over again. HE REMEMBERED!!

Who needs flowers when my husband remembered the toilet paper? Now that's true love.

Learning to say good-bye

This post is over at DotMoms today.

A helpful tip for my husband

Why can't husbands put on a new roll of toilet paper when it needs to be changed? Huh????? Why???? I wanna know!

I had to pee really bad after dinner tonight so I ran into the bathroom. My bladder felt like it was going to burst. I kept putting off going to the bathroom 'cuz I was cleaning up so it was my fault for having to pee so urgently but hey,what can ya do?

So,there I am about to get comfy on the toilet when I notice two thin squares of toilet paper hanging from the roll. With no time to spare,I opened the closet and grabbed a new roll before I gave my bladder it's much needed relief.

I replaced the old roll with the new one and walked into the bedroom where Rich was sitting at the computer. I waved the cardboard roll with it's 2 squares hanging on for dear life.

"Just so ya know,Rich....two squares of toilet paper are NOT enough to dry a wet vagina!!" He was stunned. Then he laughed. He just hates the word vagina so I throw it in whenever I can.

Hopefully,this little lesson will remind him to replace an empty roll in the future although I don't expect much at this point in our marriage!

Bye-bye-a Sanjaya!

Finally!!!!!! Sanjaya got the boot on American Idol tonight. It's about freakin' time!

In the beginning he was cute,humble and had a decent voice. I don't know what happened after that! Rich stopped watching the show. He hasn't taped it for me in weeks 'cuz the good people got sent home while Sanjaya croaked out a tune each week and his psychotic web site followers voted for him to stay since they really thought he was the worst and wanted to prove a point.

So,let the real competition begin!! I think the best 6 are up there now.

Lillianna writes about bra shopping

Well,we did it! We went bra shopping. Here is Lillianna's short post about it.

Unmentionables

Today,Lillianna and I are getting her hair cut and then going shopping for the matching pink camo lamp just like her comforter set and then......we will pick out some new unmentionables.

What are they? Well...if I wanted to tell you then I'd mention them but alas,they are called UNmentionables. The reality is,my nine year old child...no,make that young lady,had decided that it's time to go bra shopping. I asked her what she was planning to put in the bra but I was answered with an eye roll and her arms folded in front of her.

Have I forgotten what it is like to be 9??? I always vowed to remember so I wouldn't be a stupid mom saying things that no kid wants to hear. "If your friend jumped off a roof top would you do it too?" I always hated that question as a kid and I want to be in tune with my daughter.

When I told Rich that we were going bra shopping,he nearly drove off the road on his way home from work. He laughed and said,"HA! For a minute I thought you said bra shopping. We must have a bad connection."

I said,"Uhm...no...you heard me correctly." Long pause. I think he was trying to gain control of his car....and of his life. Good luck with that,buddy! We're on our way to puberty land and there is no turning back. In the next few years,we will realize that Linda Blair lives in our house. I pray she doesn't spew pea soup. What a mess that's gonna be!

So,wish me luck! This should be an interesting day!

A different life for all of us

So many changes have been made in the past couple of weeks.
Rich got a new job and he started 2 weeks ago. We will get medical and dental benefits starting June 1st which will cost much less than they did at his old job.

I gave my notice at one of my jobs. After I work this next 4 week schedule,I'll be gone from this job that I've had for the past 4 1/2 years. That means no more working Tuesday nights 4:30pm-11:30pm,Saturdays 1pm-7:30pm and Sundays 7:00am-3:30pm.

Then,I will add in hours to my ophthalmic technician job that I've had for almost 17 years and drop Saturdays 7:30am-12:00pm. As it stands now,I work Thursdays 8:30am-2:00pm and then the Saturday hours.
On my new schedule,I will work Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday 8:30am-2:00pm and if I feel like picking up a Monday or Friday morning,then I will. Either way,I won't be working any weekends or major holidays!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is a huge change in my life. I've always worked at least Saturdays in every job I've had since I was 15 years old! This will be so much fun. Lillianna can't even grasp the concept of having me home on the weekends and honestly,neither can I.

So,we're on a great new path now and I can't wait to have a better family life with this new schedule.

YAHOO!!!!!

Such a polite girl

I love Lillianna's friends. They are all sweet and funny. Tonight Ashley is sleeping over our house and the girls have been laughing since she got here at 3pm.

We went to Papa Gino's to pick up our dinner and while we were waiting on the bench,Ashley leaned over and whispered,"Please excuse my flatulence."

I cracked up and asked her where she learned that word. She smiled and said,"From my mother!" I said,"You're such a polite girl,Ash.....but you smell,honey!"
That made both girls laugh.

When her mom called at 7:30pm,I told her what happened. She had to laugh too.
I think little girls are pretty funny!

Finally feeling better!

Ah....the miracle of prescription drugs! Today is the first day that I can say I feel human again. I had some slight dizziness when I was food shopping this morning but it seems to have gone now.

I can actually BREATHE today! Isn't it odd that we take these things for granted and then when we get sick we realize how lucky we are when we're healthy. I'm still a bit congested but I feel so much better.

It is wonderful to be among the living again.

I'm a dizzy couch potato

I spent all last night and all day today on the couch. I'm planning on sleeping there again tonight since I still cough when I'm in my bed. I've only gotten off the couch to go to the bathroom or to get something in the kitchen. Every time I walk around my head spins just like the one and only time I had a hangover when I was 24.

My pills make me very sleepy so I spent most of the day in and out of consciousness.
I'm going to cut down to one cough pill three times a day instead of two and see if I am less dizzy that way. I have to function during the week so if the one pill doesn't work,I'll call my doctor on Monday. I can't go on like this. Feeling disoriented and dizzy all day long is ridiculous although my cough has gotten better. What a trade off!

If you want to laugh.....

....go to Lisa's blog and read this post.

It's amazing to think that until I strongly suggested that Lisa start a blog,she was keeping these thoughts to herself. She just cracks me up! She has a way of wording things that always makes me laugh.

Well.....I'm officially sick!

It's a good thing I went to the doctor today. I have an upper respiratory infection and an inner ear problem which is the cause of my dizziness. She put me on an antibiotic and cough pills that they call "beads." They do look like little gel beads but apparently they kick things into action. The doctor said they shouldn't make me tired but the pharmacist said they will definitely make me tired and I shouldn't drive while taking them. I guess I'll see how tired they make me and if it's really bad I'll try calling urgent care over the weekend and see what my options are.

The doctor said I should stay home from work tomorrow and then see how I'm feeling and determine whether I can manage work on Sunday. If I can't drive while on this med how the hell am I getting to work at 6:30am?????

I called my morning job and luckily there is only one doctor working and there are only 18 scheduled patients. Even with the usual 15 add ins on a Saturday,they will be okay with 4 technicians. I already called my coordinator and he said he won't need me. Now I don't have to feel guilty!

I called my other job and said I will not be in tomorrow but that I will call in the afternoon and let them know about Sunday. I just hope I feel 100% better and that I can work as scheduled. It's Easter. Who the heck will work if I don't???

I'm still nervous about the cough beads making me drowsy.Plus there's a huge notice on the bottle: DO NOT OPERATE A MOTOR VEHICLE WHILE TAKING THIS MEDICATION! Well....let's just hope for the best,shall we?

Paying the price of being sick

Literally! Since we won't have insurance for 30 days,I had to make a decision about my health. I've been getting worse all week and I've been dizzy since yesterday off and on which I think may be a sinus problem. The bottom line is.....I feel like crap!

I checked out employee health at work but they want me to see my pcp. I was trying to avoid paying hundreds of dollars for a visit with my pcp but that is what has to happen. I can't go on like this. So,I made an appt for 2:30pm today in urgent care since my doctor has Friday's off and as long as I arrive with at least $75 today,I can be seen.
I think this is more than post nasal drip. It's never made me dizzy before.

What made me stop being stubborn was when my friend Amy called me this morning.Her daughter and Lillianna have been best friends for 6 years and they're in the same dancing class. We were talking about the costumes we got on Wednesday because there is a problem with one of them and after talking to her for 10 minutes,I went into a coughing fit.....again!!! I got so dizzy that I asked Lillianna to be in charge of snacks so that I could go in my room with a cup of tea for 15 minutes. (She had 3 of the girls who are going to the dude ranch with us in June sleep over last night.)

My poor child said,"I'll take care of it,Mom. You've done enough." She makes me want to cry sometimes. She kept thinking I would cancel this party because I was sick but since I thought it was post nasal drip,I figured I'd tough it out and let her have fun. I hope this is nothing contagious. I'll feel like the worst mom on the planet.

The problem is I have 4 hours of eye exams to do in the morning,followed my 6 1/2 hours of answering the phone at my other job and then Sunday it's 8 hours of answering the phone. That's over 18 hours of non-stop talking this weekend. I couldn't even make it through 10 minutes with Amy. I hope the doctor gives me an antibiotic. I have to get better!!!

Last night I slept in bed for the first time in a week. I had just about fallen asleep when Rich turned over suddenly as if he heard one of the kids in the other room. I asked him what was wrong. He said,"Did you hear a baby crying?" I sighed and said,"That's me. That's one of the sounds my throat and chest make now."

When will I feel better??

What's that weird noise?

Oh....it's me! At night,my throat makes this bizarre wheezing sound and wakes me up. The last time I had this I was convinced I had pneumonia but of course,it was just the stupid post nasal drip.

Instead of getting better,I've been getting worse in some ways. I'm sleeping less and less at night because of the gurgling-wheezing noise that startles me awake. Talking is impossible if I have to do it for more than 10 minutes. Both of my jobs require non stop talking so I have today and tomorrow to get well enough to work both jobs on Saturday. If I talk too long I go into a coughing fit that takes a cup of tea and a cough drop to fix before I can talk again. This is really crazy.

I called my manager last night and told him that I wasn't coming in today. Four hours of doing eye exams would've killed me. Plus,if you're the patient,do you really want me coughing all over you? I didn't think so.

Lillianna is having 3 of her friends sleep over tonight since they don't have school tomorrow. I'm not contagious so it should be fun for everyone. It's a pre-dude ranch sleep over since these are the girls going on the Brownie trip in June. We'll be making s'mores with the s'more maker which is a great invention if you don't mind spending 3 hours trying to melt a marshmallow with a light bulb!

If anyone has a magical home remedy to fix my post nasal drip other than my nasal spray and Robitussin which is what my doctor always recommends,please let me know!

I feel like the 7 dwarfs!

I'm definitely Grumpy,Sneezey and Dopey today but are Coughy and Laryngitisy dwarfs too? I'd go see Doc if we had health insurance but you know how that is.

I hate being sick. This damn post nasal drip makes me nuts! That's why I'm so Grumpy!! My ears and nose drip into my throat and irritate the hell out of it. I couldn't talk for the first hour this morning so I gestured a lot. Thank goodness Lillianna knows my thoughts without words.

I've had 5 cups of tea so far this morning. I might as well just drink them while sitting on the toilet since they make me pee a million times a day. I'm waiting for Rich to come home and bring me some soup so that I can have lunch.

I think I'm going to try to get away with not showering today. All I have to do is pick Lillianna up at school so she'll understand if I look like the mom from hell.

Last night,after Rich went out to do his internet radio show,I was in my jammies on my bed with a migraine. My throat kept dripping and I coughed so much I scared Lillianna. She wanted to know if she needed to call 911. I'll admit,I was not a pretty picture.

I put an ice pack on my head and waited for the aspirin to kick in. Then I went on the couch for the rest of the night.

Today,my ears are killing me and I think I'll go take my Robitussin and take a nap until my soup arrives.

I have no patience when I am sick!!!! I have stuff to do this week!!! I don't have time to be sick!!!